


Stay

by Quiiet



Category: Harley Quinn (Cartoon 2019), Harley Quinn (Comics)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mild Sexual Content, Naked Cuddling, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicidal Thoughts, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:07:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 28,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24922033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quiiet/pseuds/Quiiet
Summary: Ivy was patient and kind. She wouldn't hurt Harley, and she only ever asked for one thing. But Harley's too good at running away, too afraid of what might be, to actually follow through.That doesn't stop her from coming back.
Relationships: Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel
Comments: 61
Kudos: 408





	1. Stay

**Author's Note:**

> i tried r e a l l y hard to get this out before the season finale tomorrow because im gonna die and it probably shows but oh well lol
> 
> ill probably come back in and clean this up later, but fer now: here it is, in all it's messy glory. stay tuned for part twooooo

With a careful turn of a key and the soft click of a lock, the door to the dark townhouse opened silently. A sudden flash of lightning and echoing boom of thunder punctuated her entrance and should have scared her, but her mind was numb to the world around her.

Harley was aware of the mud and mess she was dripping on the welcome mat but couldn't be bothered to care at the moment, resigning herself to a stern talking to later as she shuffled inside. She just managed to fumble out of her shoes before she lost her balance and hit the hardwood floor, the fall knocking what little wind she had in her lungs out and dazing her further.

Her chest ached, probably from broken ribs, and the open wounds littering her stomach and thighs made every little movement painful. They weren't too deep, otherwise she'd be bleeding more, but the knife wounds were lengthy and had crossed each other in some places. The left half of her face that had been brutally slammed into concrete had yet to finish swelling, but her left eye had nearly swollen shut and pulsed with her heart. 

She needed to get up, half awake but already hearing the annoyed sighs and insistence to not leak anymore blood on the floor. Pushing herself slowly onto her knees, Harley watched a thin vine creep close to her. "Hiya Georgia." She wheezed while reaching a hand out to stroke the plant. It retreated at her touch, recognizing her as a companion and not a threat and slinking back to wherever it came from. It was never quite clear how Georgia knew of Harley, as the blonde had yet to be introduced to the giant, man-eating plant that Ivy was so fond of, but she was thankful for whatever connection there was that prevented her from becoming a midnight snack.

If she was lucky, the fleeing vines were a sign that Ivy was still asleep and would remain that way. 

As she struggled to her knees and used a nearby side table to hoist herself up, Harley gasped as a few more vines suddenly wrapped around her waist. The hold they had on her was a loose as could be, slithering around to try and hold her in unwounded places. More crept out of the dark living room to cover her legs and lift her off the ground, carefully moving her towards the stairs and then lifting her to the top. Harley leaned against the wall as Georgia pulled her vines away and left her standing on her own. One stayed on the wall beside her, it's tip blooming into a bright purple flower that emitted a sweet and calming scent. Harley stood frozen, watching the closed door before her and holding her breath. She was sure this was the part when Ivy threw the door open and demanded to know what had happened to her.

But everything remained still, and Georgia gently nudged her forward.

Relief relaxed her. She still didn't know what she'd say to Ivy, nor did she think she was ready for whatever anger and berating awaited her. Every time she came home there was yelling and screaming, all directed at her, things thrown and that cackling laugh the clown--

 _No,_ she realized with wide eyes, _this isn't Mistah J. She isn't Mistah J. Stop making the mistake of thinkin' they'd be the same._

Ivy was patient and kind. She wouldn't hurt Harley. _Remember where ya are, Harleen. Pammy would never touch you like that._

"Thanks Georgia," Harley rasped, reaching out to stroke the flower's petals gently before pushing herself down the hall. She swayed her way past the first bedroom and prayed her uneven steps weren't as loud as they seemed. The second door -- her bedroom -- was also passed in favor of the third and final door, the light of the bathroom flicking on and dazing Harley for a moment. 

The medicine cabinet was left open as various pieces of the well used first aid kit were placed along the sink counter. Harley sat heavily on the toilet lid and made the mistake of letting her eyes close for just a moment. Sleep was all she really wanted. The thought of avoiding all the pain -- physical, mental, and emotional -- enticed her. But she forced them open again and blinked at the bright light, knowing that she couldn't trail blood anymore than she already had.

It'd be Ivy's mess to clean up after all. It was always Ivy.

Applying alcohol to her wounds and hissing at the sting, frustrated tears made their way down Harley's face that she didn't bother wiping away. It wasn't fair to keep doing this, to keep showing up at odd hours covered in bruises and crying fat tears and falling into Ivy's waiting arms. And every time, Ivy would welcome her in without a word and take care of her for however long Harley could sit still and stay for. It was never done begrudgingly, to Harley's surprise, either. Ivy had always extended a hand and shoulder to cry on since they first met in Arkham and never asked for anything in return. 

Well, that was a lie. She did ask for something only once and then refused to acknowledge it ever again.

It was said once in the heat of the moment, both lost in the throes of passion and coming down from their respective highs. Harley remembered smiling, her heart so full of happiness and satisfaction, and opening her mouth to breathe out something silly when Ivy kissed her. This kiss wasn't like the ones before, it wasn't hungry or needy. It was of pure adoration and love, gentle but firm and making the blonde's heart flutter in her chest. It was finished suddenly and Harley found herself looking into those bright green eyes as hands came up to cup each side of her face. 

"Stay with me." Ivy pleaded, her voice hoarse. She leaned down to kiss Harley again and whispered against her lips, "Please...stay."

Harley was gone in the morning. 

She never knew why she ran. She supposed at this point it was just pure instinct, that fear of whatever honeymoon phase they were in would fade and lead to her brutalization as it had with The Joker. 

It was something she regret with all her being, hating herself for even thinking that Poison Ivy could ever hurt her as The Joker did. The meta-human was so full of love and patience for her that Harley knew she didn't deserve, especially after leaving her and breaking her heart. At least, Harley assumed it broke her heart. Ivy never spoke of that night again, never said those words again and had even fallen silent during their heated bouts of sex. It made the blonde feel disgusted with herself, knowing that it was all because she had broken whatever deeper trust the two shared.

Ivy would still care for her, laugh and cry and fuck her when she needed it, but Harley wasn't sure if she would ever love her again.

Tightly wrapping and securing the bandages over the stab wounds, Harley left everything where it was and turned the bathroom light off as she stumbled back into the hall. She passed her own room without thinking, her mind clouded with pain and emotion and exhaustion as she opened the door to Ivy's room and closed it behind her.

There was little light in the room, lightning occasionally brightening it for just a second before it returned to darkness. Harley could make out the sleeping figure in bed, Ivy's naked back to her as she lay on her side fast asleep. Not bothering to remove her ruined and blood stained clothes, Harley crawled into bed and pressed herself against the other woman, bringing an arm carefully over her waist. Ivy went rigid at the touch and tensed. "'S me, Red." Harley murmured, hoping it was enough to relax the red-head.

She felt the other woman rouse and try to crane her neck around, swallowing thickly and mumbling, "Harl...?"

Harley pressed her face into the back of Ivy's neck, hoping to hide away from her and moving her hand down to grip at her stomach to pull her closer. It seemed to work as Ivy melted into her body and let herself be pulled back into the embrace. A hand slowly pulled Harley's away from her stomach and up Ivy's chest, resting it above her breast and on her heart. It was a motion they had done before, something that always calmed Harley down. It helped to assure her that Ivy was real and alive. A heartbeat was something The Joker shouldn't have lacked but did, while Ivy's heartbeat was something she insisted she lacked but never for Harley.

Lax at the gesture and warmth of the woman against her, Harley pressed her nose against Ivy's green skin and inhaled the sweet and earthy scent of her hair and let sleep take her. Laying beside her like this, Harley didn't know how she could have ever run from it.

The warmth of the sun falling on her face was the first thing Harley noticed. The second thing she noticed was the lack of a body beside her. Suddenly awake and alarmed, Harley realized her left eye wouldn't open and tried to throw herself into a sitting position only to gasp at the pain tensing her muscles caused. Remembering what happened that night and growing more panicked, she didn't try to fight the immediate tears and called with a shaking voice, "P-Pam?"

"I'm right here, peanut." Ivy replied, seeming to materialize out of nowhere to sit beside the blonde. A gentle hand reached out to brush her bangs off her forehead and Harley calmed at the touch. "Lets get you cleaned up."

It was a struggle to sit up, but with Ivy's help and an arm thrown over her shoulder, Harley got to her feet and let herself be lead into the personal bathroom without any of the fight she usually gave. Her clothes were shed slowly, peeling off her body and dropping to the floor in a heap of bloody and stale cloth. Heart in her throat now at the realization that she must have ruined Ivy's sheets, Harley tried to turn her head back to face the bedroom only to have a firm hand bring her back by the chin. Their eyes met, Ivy's expression unreadable as she carefully pressed her fingers to the swollen eye and cheek. It was obvious she wanted to say something, but her jaw clenched shut.

An all too familiar jar was pulled from a drawer and Harley groaned at the sight of the mint colored paste inside. "I know," Ivy said with a small smirk, "you hate it. But it'll only take a second, I promise." 

It did not in fact take only a second, something Harley wanted to complain about it it weren't for the harsh bite of the ointment as it was spread across her broken and bruised rip cage. She instantly grabbed Ivy by the hand and squeezed, gritting her teeth at the pain and whimpering as the muscle and tissue under her skin seemed to ripple. When it passed and became a dull prickle, Harley entwined their fingers and whined. "Do ya hafta do the cuts too? They ain't that bad, Red, honest."

Ivy thought for a moment, studying the patch work that had been done that night to the wounds carefully. "I'll leave them for now, but I will be checking them in a couple of hours." She then added with a light kiss to Harley's forehead, "Don't pout, sugar bean."

It took a lot of effort for Harley to stand, even with Ivy's help, and move to the bathtub. A familiar stool had been placed in it and she sat heavily on it, allowing Ivy step in after her and sit on the edge of the tub. Harley closed her eyes in preparation for her favorite part of the whole ordeal and listened to the water run, letting Ivy lean her backwards to rest her head in her lap. Cracking her good eye open and staring up at the green woman, Harley let a smile form on her lips. Ivy glanced down at her and quirked an eyebrow.

"Nothin'," Harley sighed out, "just thinkin'."

"A dangerous past time."

The handheld shower head came down to wet the blonde hair, Ivy's free hand carding through the locks to make sure it became thoroughly saturated. Once satisfied, both of her hands came to work in the shampoo Harley adored. It smelled of rosemary and citrus and left her hair feeling incredibly soft. Ever since she mentioned liking the stuff, Ivy had always kept the bathrooms well stocked. Secretly though, most of the time Harley chose to use Ivy's products. The comforting scents of cedarwood, sage, and ginger haunted her for days after washing and had a strange way of mollifying her.

The sensation of nails scratching her scalp brought her back and Harley groaned.

For all her reservations and guilt about taking Ivy's kindness for granted, the pampering was a selfish pleasure Harley would always want. There was just something about her hair that got her going, and having Ivy willingly indulging her wasn't something she wanted to stop soon. Between the familiar scents and comforting motions, Harley could almost fall asleep again. Ivy would alternate between lathering her hair and tenderly scrubbing her scalp; on occasion she would stroke Harley's head in a sort of feather-light massage. 

Limp and placid, Harley let the red-head move from her hair to the rest of her body to gently wipe away the grime. She took great care in avoiding the most egregious wounds during the wash and rinse, finally shutting the water off and reaching for a towel. Ivy plucked her out of the bathtub and set her on the toilet lid, watching her carefully and asking, "Can you manage the rest on your own?" Harley nodded and Ivy started out the door, hesitating and tossing over her shoulder, "I'll be right back, call if you need me."

Alone and dripping water, Harley started with her hair before drying the rest of herself off. Standing with a wince, she took stock of the clothing options Ivy had prepared for her: a set of long sleeve, blue plaid pajamas, a large t-shirt and pair of shorts, and a silky gown. Each one helped to represent which mental state Harley tended to find herself in after The Joker kicked her out. The long sleeved were for when she felt disgusting and didn't want to be touched. The over sized shirt and shorts for when she just wanted comfort. The lingerie for when she felt fine and like herself.

It was a good way to establish how to proceed in most cases, and Harley could only giggle at Ivy's clear system. It was so like her to have even this set in a scientific measure; Pamela Isley was a woman driven by logic and neuroticism. 

The shirt was over her head in an instant and Harley brought the loose collar up to her nose to breathe in the smell of the other woman. She didn't bother with the shorts, instead choosing to exit the bathroom in just the t-shirt and her panties. On the bed waiting for her was a plush pillow and hair brush, another sign of what was to come. Harley also took notice of the change of bedding, grimacing at the memory of her blood and wondering how Ivy had managed to change them out so fast. The door opened to reveal the woman in question, a steaming mug in her hand. 

They got into place wordlessly: Harley sitting on the center of the bed with the pillow hugged to her chest and the mug in hand while Ivy sat behind her with the hairbrush. The bristles weren't as comforting as Ivy's hands, but Harley closed her eyes and sighed at the touch anyways. This was typically the part where she started crying and explaining what had happened to her, but her mouth was dry and her throat shut tight. Not even the hot chocolate -- made just how she liked it with extra marshmallows, whipped cream, _and_ chocolate syrup -- could encourage her to speak. 

This time, her tears fell silently as she reflected on everything. 

It was no different than before, she messed up and The Joker taught her a lesson. No different than before, she had no idea what she had even done to set him off. And, no different than before, the 'lesson' he taught her was nothing short of beating her within an inch of her life.

Her hands shook as flashes of it replayed in her mind, of the fists that turned into the knife that then graduated to the crowbar. The grin and the laughter from The Joker and from his goons that stood around and watched the show, the calls and yells to slit her throat or feed her to Bud and Lou.

"Harley?"

She wasn't there anymore, she reminded herself, trying to focus on the hairbrush and the t-shirt and the mug of hot chocolate. 

The shaking didn't stop, nor did the weak sobs she let out. Maybe she did deserve to be beaten. She definitely didn't deserve Ivy's kindness. Maybe Mistah J was right, she was just a selfish bitch who didn't deserve anything except death. Maybe she should have just stayed and let him finish the job--

The embrace she was pulled into was what finally broke her. The mug was gone, the pillow and hairbrush cast aside, all there was was Pamela. 

The caresses, the soothing words, the scents, the acceptance, the warmth, the adoration, the _love._

Sobs shook her entire body and tore her throat. Harley tucked her face into the crook of Pamela's neck and wailed, allowing herself to cling to the woman. The heat from just her neck wasn't enough, Harley need more. She needed that reassurance that Pam was here and real and wouldn't leave her, wouldn't hurt her. Pulling away and removing her own shirt, Harley grasped the edge of the one Ivy wore and tugged it up. "Harley..." Ivy said cautiously, clearly put off by the abnormality in their routine but allowing the blonde to undress her.

"J-just hold me." Harley wept, wrapping her arms around Pamela and pushing her to lay back on the bed. Pamela recovered quickly from her uncertainty and hugged her back, taking one of her hands in her own and guiding to back to her chest, to her heart.

They lay together quietly as Harley's tears subsided, neither saying a word. Harley inched down a bit to place her head where her hand was, closing her eyes and focusing on Pamela breathing and her heart beating. In return, Pamela took to stroking Harley's head lovingly.

"I'm sorry." Harley finally whispered.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Harley."

"I ran." She lifted her head to gaze up at Ivy. "I don't wanna run again."

A kiss was pressed to Ivy's naked chest, a few more following up her neck until they were nose to nose. Harley watched Ivy's expression carefully, taking in the slight hurt in her eyes before she leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

"I'll stay." She promised. She placed a green hand over her own heart and repeated, "I'll stay _._ "


	2. Try

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two weeks of domestic bliss, or what Harley assumed was domestic bliss, had done a number on both of them. By now Ivy would come up and tell Harley about the day's research and findings. She was always punctual and believed rigidly in schedule and routine so for her to have not emerged yet meant something was either going incredibly great or incredibly awful.

Between the heavy rain on the rooftop, the warmth of the freshly finished laundry, and the cozy sweater she wore, Harley was sure she'd pass out in seconds if she stopped moving. A jaw cracking yawn worked its way out at the thought, but she pushed through the urge and continued to fold the laundry, humming to herself as she went. 

A pile for her, a pile for Ivy, and one in the middle of items that were considered first come first serve. Mostly a bunch of Ivy's old and rarely worn t-shirts and sweaters, similar to the one Harley wore now. Not that the meta-human ever minded, making sure to mention every time she found Harley in her clothes how good she looked in them.

Two weeks of domestic bliss, or what Harley assumed was domestic bliss, had done a number on both of them. Ivy would smile and laugh more, became much more affectionate and physical in her adoration -- she seemed to have let down her guard. Harley felt like she could finally relax and be open about the gnawing guilt inside her, became more open about how she was feeling and honest -- especially to herself. They had a routine that they fell into that made them both happy, would sometimes make dinner together or just order pizza and watch trashy movies until the sun came up or would just sit in silence doing their own respective tasks and bask in the comfort of one another. Petty theft came in between, although that aspect of their lives seemed to be on hold while they continued to figure themselves out.

That seemed like it should be whatever domestic bliss was, at least to Harley, but she hadn't the slightest clue how to be sure. It wasn't like anything she had experienced before. It made her heart swell and her cheeks hurt from smiling. Even now, doing a boring chore like laundry, Harley grinned to herself and loved every second of it. Everything was practically perfect. It felt like a dream come true.

The TV she had turned on for background noise suddenly blared a news alert and her night got even better. Harley let out a cackle as she heard the news report and set aside the clothes she was folding.

Batman sent The Joker back to Arkham.

"Oh man!" Harley wheezed, wiping a tear away, "Red! Ya gotta come see this!" She called out for the woman knowing full well she wouldn't hear her, standing up and stretching her arms over her head. Ivy spent most of the day and evening in her 'office' as Harley called it. The garage and basement turned miniature green house and laboratory were the two places in the entire townhouse Harley refused to enter alone. It wasn't a rule given to her but a rule she decided for herself; she had her things and Ivy had hers. Plus the first and last time Harley ventured downstairs she finally met Georgia and proceeded to fear every every little creak or groan the house made for two days.

But it was almost time for dinner anyways and by now Ivy would come up and tell Harley about the day's research and findings. She was always punctual and believed rigidly in schedule and routine so for her to have not emerged yet meant something was either going incredibly great or incredibly awful.

Skipping to the garage door and opening it a crack, Harley peaked inside while calling in a sing-song voice. "Paaaam-a-laaaamb! It's almost time for suppeeeeeeer!" No response furthered Harley's assumption that something was going on, so she slipped into the humid room without any further preamble. Most of the plants housed in here weren't as sentient as others Ivy nurtured, only a few seeming to react and wriggle as Harley passed by. Reaching a hand out to stroke a few new budding flowers, Harley stopped to coo at them and whisper, "Hi babies."

Something nearby suddenly crashed and Ivy let out a reactive _"Shit!"_ before loudly growling in frustration. 

"Uh oh," Harley told the flowers, "sounds like Mama isn't havin' a good time down there. You guys keep doin' ya thing, Auntie Harley will go talk'er down off the ledge."

The small spiral stairs that lead into the basement rattled with every heavy step she took, making each stomp on purpose to alert the woman below of her presence. Coming around the last curve and leaning against the stone wall, Harley looked around the lab and settled her eyes on the desk opposite to the stairs. Ivy sat hunched over something, a hand on her face and the other gripping a now broken pen. Behind her was a broken flask, uncharacteristically left untouched where it shattered. "Daffo-doll?" Harley asked without leaving her perch on the steps, "Everythin' alright?"

The lack of response was worrisome. Looking closer, Harley noticed a tremble in Ivy's shoulders and instantly flinched at memories of similar occurrences that would end in screams and punches. Shaking her head to snap out of it while reminding herself that that wasn't her life anymore, Harley mustered up her courage and left the sanctuary of the stairs. She stepped over the broken glass and came to stand awkwardly beside the red-head, unsure what to do next. Ivy would never hurt her but she could still get annoyed with her, and that wasn't something Harley wanted.

"Pammy?" She said quietly. 

No reaction.

"Hey, Red? You okay?"

Still nothing.

Worry was growing in the pit of her stomach. She tried again, "Pamela honey? Your freakin' me out now-" She touched Ivy's shoulder and the woman stood up suddenly, jerking away from the contact and looking at Harley with a wild look in her eyes. The blonde shrank away, her arms coming up to protect herself instinctively and her body tensing in preparation for what was to come.

"Oh God, Harley!" Ivy gasped, starting to move closer but stopping herself, "I'm so sorry! It's okay, you're okay, I'm not going to hurt you! I am so sorry, Harls!"

It took a lot of effort to make herself stand up straight again and even then Harley couldn't calm her nerves or stop her hands or voice from shaking. "It's okay, Red. I know ya wouldn't. Are you okay? Seems like your work's stressin' ya out; wanna talk about it?"

"That doesn't matter," Ivy insisted as she held her hands out in offering, dropping the busted pen to the floor "what does is you. Harley, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you. Are you alright?" Harley looked at the ink stain the pen left but took her hands and moved in to hug the taller woman, feeling her relax and hold her back. "The effects of my transformation were never fully recorded and I'm curious if I can replicate it in a controlled environment on tissues." She finally admitted with a long sigh, her embrace tightening slightly. "But what's left from that...research isn't mine and it's impossible to make sense of. It's just nonsense over and over and it's infuriating to think I once understood it and I--...it's just been a shitty day."

"Wanna hear some good news then? B-Man put Mistah J back in Arkham."

"That...is good news."

"It's also time for dinner if ya wanna call it quits for tonight."

Ivy let go and turned back to her desk to stare intensely at the paperwork there. "That's probably a good idea." Her gaze shifted to the mess on the floor and she shook her head with an exasperated sigh. "I'll clean that up later."

She sounded almost defeated, something Harley took note of but kept to herself as she reached down to entwine their fingers. A gently tug towards the stairs was all it took to get Ivy moving upstairs, albeit in an eerie silence. Leading her to the small dining room table and depositing her in a chair with a kiss to the temple, Harley let the uneasy feeling wash away as she started on dinner. Humming to herself as she worked and forcing herself to be comfortable in the persisting quiet, Harley tried to remember the happier mood she had been in before and mentioned with a peppy smile, "I found those socks ya thought ya lost! The suckers we're tryin' to hide between the washer and dryer along with a pair of my undies, the traitors!"

The hum she got in response tried to deflate her but Harley pushed through as she let a pot of water boil and took to browning some beef. "I also figured out that crossword ya couldn't, but I didn't know where the paper went so I didn't fill it in. Should be _'Elysium'_. Pretty ironic for us, huh? Oh -- and speakin' of ideal happiness, I know you're not a fan of the boys, but I'm worried now that Mistah J is locked up that no one's gonna be around for Bud'n'Lou. Not that he ever helped with them, but his guys did, ya'know? So I was thinkin' that maybe I could bring'em over here? I promise to clean up after them and make sure they stay outta your stuff and away from the babies! They're angels, Red, I swear, and it breaks my heart to think about them bein' all alone."

"Sure Harls."

Now that caught her off guard. She was expecting a much bigger fuss over this.

Harley turned around to stare at Ivy in disbelief. Ivy sat with her face in her hands, clearly not paying attention to the conversation and lost in thought. Miffed at the revelation and feeling a ornery kick coming on, Harley kept watching her as she pushed further. "I was also thinkin' about installin' a balance beam in the living room. It just gets so borin' some times and it'd give me somethin' to do. That okay?"

"Yeah."

"And I'm probably gonna go ahead and change out the mattress for a water bed while I'm at it -- seems like it'd be more comfortable. Maybe I'll add some tasteful furs to the walls too."

"Uh huh."

"Oh, and I almost forgot! I've got plans to go golfin' with Two Face this weekend and after we're gonna go get matching tramp stamps, mind if I borrow your credit card for it, Pammy? I might also need it for all the money I'm getting ready to donate to Wayne Enterprises. While I'm at it, why don't I also go to the store and buy you as many of those little snack cakes you hate as I can? Do you hate the chocolate or the strawberry flavored ones more?"

"Sounds good."

Ears hot and temper short, Harley slapped her spatula on the counter top and pointed it accusingly at Ivy as she shot up with wide eyes. " _Ah-ha!_ She lives! Now are ya gonna actually listen to me or are ya gonna just keep sittin' there like a bump on a log?" The spite in her left at the guilty look on Ivy's face and Harley set the spatula down to take the two strides to be beside her. "I know you've got something on your mind, Pam. I'm here if you want to talk about it."

She cringed inwardly at her own voice. She sounded less like 'Harley' and closer to 'Harleen'. Ivy seemed to notice it and took to fiddling with the ends of her fiery hair, something she had done during their sessions at Arkham. A defense mechanism, Harley had noted then and now, something to calm her down and keep her focus on dodging all questions and concerns. It infuriated Harleen then but now it only filled Harley with sadness. It was a reminder than despite everything they had been through, despite the past two weeks of paradise they lived in, Pamela still didn't trust her enough to let her in.

The neurosis that effected Pamela Isley had always been described in her files as only being a portion of her personality, but Harleen just knew that that wasn't the case as soon as they met. There was something in there that needed to be shared that could explain the behavior and it's subsequent patterns; something had led to her lack of vulnerability -- and dare she think guilt -- that had yet to reveal itself even after months of one on one therapy. The working theory Harleen had before she was pulled from Pamela to work with The Joker was that it was a combination of psychological projection and an internalized disorder. She never had enough time to get the diagnosis correct and it was something that bothered her for weeks until her mind had warped in and around that grinning madman.

Yanking herself out of her thoughts and mentally slapping herself, Harley made herself grin wide. "Kick off your Sunday shoes and relax, Red. It's break time, which means it's time to have fun! Ya know what always cheers me up?"

"Cereal so sugary it could kill you?" Ivy replied with a wry smile.

"Not this time, sweetie!" She pressed an over-dramatic kiss to her cheek and returned to her cooking. "Grandma Quinzel's secret recipes from the old country! This one is so lucrative and hard to make that I only make it for the people I really care about! She called this heaven-sent dish: spaghetti." 

The laughter she garnered put the warm fuzzies back in her chest and Harley giggled too. Dinner was finished with light conversation after that and all of Harley's previous concerns were gone for now. She plated their meals and returned to the table balancing both of their bowls, two wine glasses, and an unopened bottle of white wine. Ignoring Ivy's insistence to open the wine citing that last time Harley 'shattered a lightbulb', the cork fired off to get lost under some furniture with a triumphant shout of " _Yahtzee!_ " 

"So, whatcha think of my Granny's secret recipe, Red? Life changin' ain't it." Harley asked as she poured their drinks.

"I think she should have patented it." Ivy said with mirth, "She clearly taught you well. Thank you for dinner, Harls."

"Hey no problem! But I gotta confess, Grandma Quinzel didn't teach me how to make it. It was actually the French chef _Monsieur Kraft._ One of the first things I learned to make by myself, right after birthday cake."

"Birthday cake?"

"Yep!" Harley popped the 'p' and swirled some noodles around her fork. "Mom always had an excuse to not make one. 'I'm too tired', 'my back hurts', 'I'll getcha next year'. And Dad was his usual deadbeat, bastard self who wanted nothin' to do with anything. Not that I cared, but I couldn't let Barry have his birthday without a fuckin' cake! That's like the whole point!"

Ivy lowered her own fork and repeated, "Barry?"

Taking the huge bite of her food and mumbling around it, Harley purposefully watched her food as she explained. "My kid brother; I thought I told you about him. A few years younger than me, a real pain in my ass and spoiled brat. Always followin' me around and wantin' to copy me. He used to irritate the shit outta me when we were kids!" She couldn't help but grow a little misty eyed at the memories and continued. "He'd always ask me for red velvet cake with cream cheese frostin' -- those were his favorite. I'd try and surprise him with it but he would catch me bakin' and come help. We had some good times in that kitchen, just the two of us makin' a mess and laughin' til we got belly aches. And then when he got older he flipped the script and started makin' me birthday cakes."

"What kind of cake did you ask for?"

A sudden sorrow overcame Harley and she hid it with a long sip of her wine. "Red velvet," She murmured, "'cause it was his favorite." There was a long pause and Harley steeled herself before revealing, "He died before I graduated college. He had just started high school. He played baseball and one day just never came home from practice. Never found out exactly what happened, but I always assumed it was one of Dad's messes followin' him home." The quiet that fell between them became close to suffocating her and Harley cleared her throat and glanced up at Ivy, asking with forced cheer, "What about you? What was lil Pammy's first cookin' experience? I'm placin' my bets on somethin' snooty like lobster tail or wagyu beef."

Ivy rolled her eyes and said with a groan, "Creme brulee."

" _HAH!_ Yer shittin' me!"

"God I wish!" She stabbed angrily at her food and said with a huff. "Cooking was included in these _stupid_ etiquette classes my parents forced me to go to. The teacher was this old, senile bitch named Mrs. Hatfield -- God she hated me so much, and I loathed her right back. I swear that woman lived to single me out for every little thing. 'Back straight, Ms. Isley'! 'A lady doesn't roll her eyes'! 'Swearing is for sailors, not proper young women'!" She mimicked in a nasally, haughty voice that made Harley cackle. "When my mother told me that she died of a heart attack I laughed in her face and got grounded for a month, but it was worth it! The only good things I ever learned from those stupid fucking lessons were how to lie successfully and how to give backhanded compliments with a smile on my face!"

Harley batted her eyelashes and said in faux sincerity with a southern accent, "Why I do declare! Miss Pamela Lillian Isley! You didn't think learnin' how to cook dinners for your husband's business partners was a good thing? How ever not, Madam Isley? How else are you to please your gentlemen callers and their manly needs?"

"If it weren't for the fact that I love you, and even that's a stretch right now, I would come across this table and strangle you."

"That accurate huh?"

"Jesus Christ Harls, you sounded just like my mother."

The laugh they shared echoed throughout the townhouse. Harley used the moment to wipe the tears out of her eyes and refill their wine glasses. Ivy took a generous gulp and motioned for another, nearly draining it again immediately. "The most cooking I ever did was in college. I was the shy, spoiled rich kid that everyone hated. It was easy to buy their friendship when everyone was exhausted, broke, and starving." She chortled and gestured with her hands as she went on, "We weren't suppose to have hotplates, but no one would come challenge me about mine because of my parents. I tried to make things that were easy and in bulk; I'd make these huge pots of soups or stews or casseroles and would just wait for people to come knocking on my door. Didn't matter how much they didn't like me or how well they knew me, I'd have a line of people waiting outside to get in and then scurry back to their own rooms."

"That's actually really sweet of you, Red."

"Yeah it was pretty cool. Except for my last semester before grad school -- there was an unusual amount of underclassmen who stayed on campus for the holidays that year and I had nothing better to do so I woke them all up on Christmas with breakfast in the student lounge. Pancakes, waffles, bacon and eggs, the whole thing. I had kids showing up from different buildings to come and eat and sit around to watch twenty-four hour Christmas specials. It was alright, but when the last semester started and word got around I started getting called 'Saint Isley'."

Ivy paused her story to reach for the wine again but stopped herself and stood to walk in the kitchen instead. Harley watched her in interest as she pulled a half-emptied bottle of honey whisky from the spot Harley had stashed it in before returning to her seat. "And here I thought I had that hidden well." She said with a slight pout. Ivy rolled her eyes and filled her wine glass with it, pouring a rather generous amount by Harley's standards. "You ain't playin' around tonight, huh Red?"

"You said it yourself," She took a long drink of it and finished her sentence with a long sigh, "it's time for a break. That and if I'm going to keep talking about college I'm going to need all the alcohol I can get."

"Oh? Does the legend of Saint Isley continue?"

"Fuck you, Harls." The smile she wore was contagious as she resumed her story. "So in post-grad, it was a lot of the same shit as before but this time the other people in my program also hated me because I was better than them. Their words, not mine. Nevertheless, they still showed up like clock work to my apartment for dinners and some times I'd even cook in one of the labs for convenience. But this time we all actually became friends, in a strange and roundabout way. We were all still competing with one another to try and win Woodrue's apprenticeship, but it was more like a friendly rivalry between all of us. Even after I won and started working with him, we kept getting together as a group to discuss research and just talk."

That distant look in her eyes returned and she downed the rest of her glass. Harley shifted at the discomfort in the air again but made herself still as Ivy reached for the whisky again and spoke almost numbly. "But the further our research went the less I was allowed to see them. There was always something more important going on with our findings and Jason needed me right there for everything. It didn't matter how little I had slept or if I had eaten anything in the past two days, he was always pushing me for more. And I was so stupid for believing him every time and giving in. I went right back to isolating myself just because he convinced me to. I thought it was because he cared so much about me, but it was never about me to begin with."

 _Bingo._ Harleen thought to herself. She hated how her well-intended attempts at distraction had circled right back to psychoanalyzing but she also couldn't deny the results. It was an easy enough tactic: start casual and get the other party hooked before steering casual conversation into an emotionally charged one, tell a story to garner pity and get the other party to willingly open up, let them speak freely but still trying to guide the conversation with slight hints towards their own emotions, and then see what happened. It was an easy enough tactic for her because it was the same one The Joker had used on her.

She hated herself for even doing it. It felt like she was sinking to his level, like she was manipulating Ivy -- which she was to an extent. Harley had only justified her plan by reminding herself that despite their two weeks of paradise, Pamela still didn't trust her with everything. If she was ever going to repay Pam for all she had done for her, Harley had to get some sort of start and this seemed like the best one.

"It was about the research." Harley nodded as if filling in the blank. _Gentle pushes, Harleen._

"No." Ivy stared at the bottom of her glass and spoke with hollow eyes, "It was always about control. Jason presented himself as this caring, sincere guy. He acted like he believed in me and that he thought I could be more than I was worth, but it was all an act. I was a sheltered idiot, smart with books but completely ignorant to everything else. He convinced me that our relationship was still strictly professional but kept pushing the line to get what he wanted. The more he pushed, the more I started to realize how fucked up it was. His temper was short, his compliments and reassurances were getting sleazier, he didn't try to hide how uninterested he was in my knowledge and skill. I was just a piece of meat he could flaunt. I wasn't myself anymore, but I don't think I ever knew who I was to begin with."

A ice was creeping up Harley's spine as Pamela spoke, familiar and horrifying. The ice had been there the first time Doctor Quinzel met The Joker, and it stayed with her for every moment there after. The fact that it was returning now was something Harley wished she could shake off, but it ran bone deep throughout her body. Her fists clenched to try and bring some feeling back to them and her eyes stayed trained on the beautiful red hair before her, focusing on it to try and ground herself. 

"I thought something was wrong with me. He kept telling me he loved me, but it never felt right. But what the hell did I know. He'd take and take and take until I didn't think I had anything left to give." Ivy paused to take the whisky bottle in hand and drink straight from it. "But he still found more and he took that too. That's when he started poisoning me."

"He what?" Harley whispered in disbelief. Her fingers twitched as if searching for a pen. That old, forgotten part of her brain was registering that this was new information and it compelled her to record it. Whatever Pamela was about to say wasn't even included in her case file. The only information they had on her was that she was a promising student from Seattle who studied under Woodrue before dropping out and taking a random turn into a life of crime in Gotham.

"It was small at first, excusable by flu season or allergies, and I actually thought that his concern for me was from his heart. He was only concerned about his walking petri dish and whatever fucked up 'information' he was getting out of it." She snorted to herself and let it become a humorless laugh as she covered her eyes with one hand. "More like getting off to it, really. By the time I realized what was going on it was too late. I was dying. He kept saying that he'd fix me so I just let him keep going. I thought I didn't have anything else to lose. But then I woke up six months later in the hospital, having died twice by their records but probably more, alone and in a body that didn't feel like mine anymore."

There was a pause, and Harley wished that she had something to say, anything. "Jesus Christ." She choked out, unaware of the tears in her eyes until now. Ivy laughed at her words and lowered her hand to look Harley dead in the face.

"I really fucking wish I had just stayed dead. Or that even now I didn't keep coming back. I just...want to stop." She admitted with a wide smile. 

Harley's throat closed and she squeezed her eyes shut while turning her head away. A sudden grief in her chest seemed to weigh her down and she denied herself the sob bubbling up her throat. She hated herself even more than before now. This wasn't something she should have pushed for, not something that she'd ever want Ivy to say -- let alone while drunk. "Ive I--" Harley made herself look to the other woman again only to find her standing and moving towards the loveseat in the living room.

"Is it your turn to pick a movie or is it mine?" Ivy called over her shoulder, voice jovial but slightly slurred from drink. "I think that gross reality show you love so much is on...shit we just missed it. Oh! Check it out! Old school horror movie marathon!" 

"Are you okay?" Harley asked bluntly, pinching herself on the thigh for being an idiot and to keep her voice even.

Pamela grimaced and lowered the remote. "Yeah? I'm not that drunk, Harls. Don't you wanna watch a movie?" She pat the free cushion beside her and motioned for the blonde to join her.

Leaving behind the remnants of there dinner and begrudgingly moving to the loveseat, Harley kept a careful eye on her friend as they both settled in. Slowly, Harley pressed the issue. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"What's there to talk about?" Then her eyes widened at realization and she let out a groan, "Did I forget to thank you for dinner? God, I'm the worst! Thanks for cooking tonight, Harls. I really appreciate--"

"Are you purposefully dodging the fact that you just admitted to me that you're suicidal or are you more drunk than you know?"

They stared at one another in silence. Neither moved or averted their gaze. They just sat and waited for one of them to make the first move. Harley's jaw was aching from how hard she had to clenched, but it was the only way to keep herself from breaking down and throwing herself into Ivy's arms. Ivy's expression kept changing, first to confusion then to disbelief then to anger and then to shock before finally settling on an unreadable blank look.

"I-I...I just wanna watch a movie." She pleaded finally.

Harley released a shaky breath and closed her eyes.

"Fine."

The movie they started was barely watched. At first they did a good job of at least pretending, but Harley noticed how Ivy fidgeted slightly. She knew it was because she was being cold and closing herself off, but Harley couldn't just forget what had just happened.

But forgetting was always easy when Ivy was near. 

Harley had just started actually paying attention to what was on screen when her vision became filled with Pamela. She had placed herself in Harley's lap in an instant, pressing open-mouthed kisses to her neck and whispering apologies up into her ear. The frustrated logical part of her brain wanted Pamela to stop but the more dull reactionary part of her brain commanded her to kiss back. Before she could make her final decision, Ivy was kneeling on the floor and tugging Harley's lounge pants down. "Let me make it up to you." She murmured into Harley's skin, not waiting for any further response before dragging her tongue up the front of her panties.

The movie they started was barely watched. What little Harley had seen in the beginning was all she got before she became too preoccupied with the woman between her thighs. She was a gasping mess after only a few minutes, her hands instinctively coming to hold tightly to Ivy's red hair as she urged her for more.

The orgasm was quick and satisfying, but Harley didn't have time to relax yet as Ivy pulled her to her feet and led her upstairs to their bedroom. Their clothes were tossed to the floor in every which way as they met on the bed for a heated kiss. Harley desperately tried to get Ivy to slow down, but she moved with an intense purpose. Her attempts halted when a thigh pressed between her legs, Harley biting back her moan but letting herself grind up into the contact. Ivy smile down at her and urged her to continue as she leaned down to kiss and suck the skin along Harley's collarbone. 

"Keep going." Ivy pressed her and subsequently pressed further into her. She moved to straddle one of Harley's thighs and began to mirror the blonde's movements. Harley brought a hand up to try and caress her breasts, but her wrist was caught and lowered to the bed. "No." Ivy said more seriously, her once soft and sensual expression now stony and cold. Harley noticed the shift and how it was unusual. Sure, Ivy would take the lead most of the time and give Harley what she wanted, but only on a few occasions had they gotten more involved with their sex. Those times -- when Harley wasn't allowed to touch back without the promise of a blissful punishment afterwards -- Ivy was still open and indulgent. 

Something still wasn't right, and Harley knew it was because of what happened over dinner, but she chose to push it down for the moment. She had already decided that she wanted to treat Pamela and make it up to her, so if this is where and how it started so be it. If she wanted to forget her worries for a moment for a fuck, Harley was happy to oblige her. 

Mind shutting down for the moment, Harley let her hand be held to the bed and instead bent her knee slightly to put her thigh more solidly against Pamela. The reaction to it was a sigh and hands on her hips to get a better grip and angle. They rocked against each other fervor, gasping and moaning as they sought their own pleasures together. Harley took to fondling her own breasts, pinching and pulling at her nipples in the rough way she liked while watching Ivy through half-lidded eyes. The red-head bit her lip at the display and suddenly pulled herself off and away. She re-positioned herself at the apex of Harley's thighs again and kissed her way up from the knee.

Her mouth was hot and her tongue quick to find Harley's clitoris. The broad movements she made mirrored the ones from earlier but she only did them for a moment before her lips closed and she lightly sucked. Harley started to reach for her hair again but stopped herself, taking the sheets in her hands instead and impatiently thrusting her hips into Ivy's mouth. "Tell me." Pamela whispered as she rested her chin on Harley's mound, her fingers coming up to tease at her entrance. 

"God, Red," Harley hissed while following the contact, "please."

"Tell me more than just that." She chuckled. "I'm all yours, Harley. Just tell me what you want. How you want."

"Holy shit, ya can't just say shit like that. Your mouth, your hands, please just anything. Please, Pammy."

She received both at the same time and didn't try to hold in the loud moan they brought out. It didn't just stop at her second orgasm and almost didn't after her third. Pamela didn't yield until Harley touched the crown of her head with a trembling hand and said with heaving breaths, "Okay, okay...you gotta stop. I won't be able to get you if you don't."

Pamela rose from her position and turned away to sit on the edge of the bed. "Don't worry about it." She murmured. 

"Excuse me?" Harley scoffed while sitting up and crawling closer, "You just made my fuckin' brain melt three times over and you don't want me to return the favor?"

"No I just..." She was uncharacteristically shy all of a sudden and refused to look at Harley, "I just don't really feel like it."

"Is it about before?"

"Maybe."

"Pam."

Ivy gave a half-hearted shrug and confessed, "Yes. But it's not your fault. I just don't feel very...I don't know, desirable? Fuckable? God, I don't-- I feel disgusting, okay? I want you. I want you to touch me, but I close my eyes and I just keep seeing him." Her voice quivered and she whispered, "I haven't felt like this in a long time, haven't felt him. But it's like he's here and in my head and I just can't block him out."

Harley scooted to sit right behind her. "He's not here, Pammy. He can't hurt you anymore. And if you think he is, that he's gonna show up and try, I'm gonna be right be your side to kill'em. I'm not gonna let anyone, especially that sonova bitch, touch you." She reached out to place a comforting hand on Ivy's shoulder and waited for her to relax at the touch before coming closer and hugging her with both arms. "It's just you'n'me," Harley told her, "no one else. Just me and the most beautiful gal I know."

Gradually, by degrees, Pamela's body shuddered gently as she wept quietly but let herself rest limp in Harley's embrace.

"After what happened to you," Pamela asked hoarsely, "did you ever wonder if there was anyone who could love you as you are?"

"I did." Harley said, her heart aching all the while, "After the first time Mistah J kicked me out. It was the first time I actually realized what happened to me and it stuck with me after. I think it's why I stayed with him; I was scared. 'Who will love me as I am?', I didn't think anyone could. But then I met you. You didn't care about the fucked up skin or crazy eyes, you just cared about me." She lightly pressed a kiss to the top of Pamela's shoulder as she continued, "You've always been patient with me, you laugh at my jokes and you're always here. Even when I run away like an idiot."

"You're not an idiot Harley."

"No, I am. I'm the biggest idiot this side of Gotham fer ever thinkin' anything less of you and how you treat me. And now I just wanna treat you right too, however I can." Her chin came to rest on the spot she had kissed and Harley hugged Pamela tighter. "I'll never leave you, Red." Her hand shifted to rest on Pamela's chest, her palm resting just over her heart to punctuate her promise. "And I'm real glad you're still here, too. I can't imagine a life without my best friend. My beautiful, badass, super smart, super sexy, and super lovin' best friend. I know I ain't much, but I hope someday I can give you a reason to want to stick around. Til then, I'll just hafta keep tryin' because I love you. Do you think you can promise me you'll try too?"

Pamela's chest heaved with a new sob and she turned to return the hug, burying her face in Harley's neck and clinging to her. They sat entangled until Harley's back began smarting and she brought them up the bed to lay together under the sheets. In a reversal of their usual positions, Harley lay with her head on a pillow while Pamela sank down with the covers around her neck, still holding tightly to the blonde's chest and pressing her forehead against her collarbone. Harley let the other woman weep quietly into her skin, petting her hair and murmuring affirmations and adoring words all the while. There was safety here in their shared bed, sheltered away from the world's cruelty and the monsters who haunted them.

"I'm not gonna run away from you." Harley promised, "Never again."

Pamela lifted herself up until they were nose to nose, her eyes still glimmering with tears. She leaned forward to give Harley a passionate kiss and broke away to reply back with a broken voice. "I know you won't."

"But if I'm stayin', so are you, Pammy. Like I said, just you'n'me, right?"

"Yeah...I'll stay with you too, Harls."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helloooooo! i didn't intend for this to take so long, but i couldn't settle on how i wanted to end it. it was originally gonna be a LOT more angst and overall not a happy ending, but i reworked it because i just couldn't do it right now. i've had enough of sad things for the moment. i hope this chapter doesn't seem as all over the place as i think it is. i've had a lot on my mind while writing it and i think it shows but what can ya do right? 
> 
> now do me a favor and go tell someone you love them, time with loved ones is precious! ⊂(´• ω •`⊂)


	3. You're Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley scoffed and motioned to their breakfast making, "You think we're goin' soft? Us? In this nicely decorated studio apartment with the TV set to record episodes of a shitty sitcom every Wednesday night and neighbors who we actually talk to and like? I've never felt further from domesticated in my life!"

The cold of the room, the world outside their blankets and bed, wasn't something Harley wanted to rising willingly into. It seemed so much easier to just lay in bed with Pamela curled around her and still dead to the world, and ignore everything else around them. In fact, it _was_ easier -- they had done it plenty of times before. But between the ache in her hip and the hunger in her stomach, Harley resigned herself to getting up and braving the new day.

Her shifting to sit up disturbed Pamela, a green hand coming out of the safety of the blankets to find Harley's hand and loosely drag it back into the warmth of bed. Smiling at the sight, Harley compromised the loss of her body heat by tossing her half of the blankets atop the other woman, watching her grip them into her chest and retreat under them with a pleased sigh. 

The winter months had hit them hard; The Joker had nearly escaped Arkham and made his anger about Harley's absence clear, Batman had caught onto their methods of escape and nearly sent them both back to Arkham, they had to leave behind Ivy's townhouse for a crummy apartment on the west side of the city, and it was almost Christmas and Harley still didn't know what to get her girlfriend. Well, the last thing wasn't that important to her ( _yet._ She still had a few more weeks to figure it out), but despite all of the bad luck they ran into the season didn't feel as dreary and sad as it normally did.

Maybe because she was free of The Joker, maybe because Ivy had surprised her on her birthday with a Menorah and a willingness to learn, maybe because this apartment was _theirs_ \-- not something she ran away to but something she found and had a hand in from the start, or maybe it was just the weather.

Growing up in Gotham meant that Harley was well acclimated to the cold, and after her dip in the acid she hardly felt it. Heat was more of her weakness, but Pam absolutely wilted in the snow -- literally. She had explained to Harley how during the colder months her powers took a huge hit and so did her energy. Essentially -- like her plants -- she would try and enter a pseudo-state of dormancy until the temperature lifted to a 'bearable' degree. What it also meant was that she became a complete and total cuddle-fiend and blanket hog. 

"I'm trying to get some of your body heat." Ivy explained once with a blush after Harley called her out on the sudden increase in affection. Not that Harley minded, she never would if it meant getting Ivy in her lap more often.

Creeping out of their bedroom and into the living room, Harley took the four steps required to reach the kitchenette and started the coffee maker. Pulling a well-used pan from a cabinet as well as everything needed for breakfast from the fridge, she set about cooking their meal with a quiet hum. Eggs cooked overhard for Pam, eggs cooked scrambled with cheese for herself. Bacon cooked limp for herself, some made crispy for Pam. Toast buttered and set aside for Pam, toast made into a sandwich with the eggs and bacon for herself.

Harley had just started browning some potatoes when she felt arms coming around her waist. The motion used to startle her and bring a sudden panicked response, but now it only put a wide grin on her face. "Mornin', Daffo-doll." Pamela moaned in response and pressed herself further into the blonde's back. "I got some coffee brewin' and should be done with the taters lickety-split. I'll bring you yer plate if ya wanna go take a load off."

"It's fine." Pamela murmured into her shoulder, "Do you need any help finishing up?"

"Not unless you wanna fix me my coffee?" Harley said sweetly, batting her eyelashes even though she wouldn't see. Removing herself from Harley, Ivy stepped beside her to pull two mugs out and filled them. Harley glanced over at her and stifled a chortle at the sight of her red hair in an incredible state of disarray. "Maybe Dande-lionness is more accurate this mornin'. Ya look like you've maybe _heard_ of a hairbrush once."

Ignoring the tease, Ivy returned the glance albeit more seriously and asked, "How's your hip?"

The injury came from a miss step in their latest robbery and escape. Her foot had gotten caught on a step and Harley had gone ass-over-tea-kettle down a flight of stairs. The large bruise spanning the side of her hip was the worst thing to come out of it and rendered her unable to walk by herself, but thanks to Ivy's care and concoctions, she could get around on her own. 

"Peachy-keen, sugar bean!" She answered, hopping from foot to foot to prove her point. "Nothing some lazy days in bed and a few kisses can't cure!"

Smirking as she stirred sugar into their coffees, Ivy mentioned dryly, "You know, I get the feeling that we've had too many of those days here lately."

"Aww, bored of me already, Pammy?"

"Oh hush. Just worried that we're losing our edge is all."

Harley scoffed and motioned to their breakfast making, "You think we're goin' soft? _Us?_ In this nicely decorated studio apartment with the TV set to record episodes of a shitty sitcom every Wednesday night and neighbors who we actually talk to and like? I've never felt further from domesticated in my _life!_ "

"As nice as it all is, I am being serious Harley." Ivy's brows furrowed and she stared at the counter while saying, "We haven't really done anything illegal since we moved in here--"

"Excuse me?" Harley gasped, "Stealin' that nice electric car was your idea and so illegal! And those fancy-pants gadgets we just stole for Kitty! And so was opening the mail of the previous tenant!"

"We haven't done anything illegal enough for _Batman_ yet. At least enough for him to care about coming after us." Ivy clarified, "But what if you getting hurt is a sign that we're out of practice. I'm clearly in no shape to go up against him by myself for at least another three months and everything green is harder to connect with."

Harley flicked the stove top off and doled out the potatoes onto their plates. "Who said yer goin' up against him all by yourself? I'm here, ain't I?" They moved to the small island facing the living room and sat down to eat, Harley ready to dig in but Pamela still lost in thought. Reaching over to take her hand, the blonde gave her a smile and said, "Hey, turn that big, beautiful brain of yours off for a second and listen to me. So what if we're not as practiced as we used to be? We're Poison Ivy and Harley-fuckin'-Quinn, we're unstoppable!"

"I appreciate your enthusiasm as always, Harls, but realistically speaking--"

"Realistic my pale ass! What's your rush? It's not like we're on a time crunch here, Red. Why not just settle in for the winter and go back to livin' footloose and fancy free in the spring?"

Ivy shrugged and stabbed at her eggs while muttering, "I just didn't know if you were tired of this yet."

"Why would I be tired of this?" Harley asked with a deep frown. "I know I can be impulsive and sporadic, but I've never had something like this before and it's real nice. I don't care if we hold off on crime sprees until you're back on your feet, I just care about you." They were quiet for a moment, Ivy not meeting her gaze but still clearly in deep thought. Leaning over and bumping her shoulder lightly, Harley added, "I know you can't help it but you're overthinking things, Pammy. After how crazy this year has been, you deserve to take a break."

"It's hard to take a break when I can feel and hear the Earth dying around me." Ivy said bluntly.

"I know, and ya need to fight for it, but give yourself time to get back to one-hundred percent before you go blowin' up chemical plants and what not. What we've got here, it's nice, and I think it'd be even nicer to keep playin' house. At least until the holidays are over. Which reminds me: how do you feel about that nice fancy spa downtown?"

A smile finally graced the redhead's features and she rolled her eyes. "Harley when I said you didn't have to get me a gift for Christmas I meant it."

"Well you said you wanted to celebrate Hanukkah with me so it's only fair that I celebrate Christmas with you!"

"I don't even _celebrate_ Christmas! I haven't for years!"

"And I haven't done Hanukkah for years either! So we're even!" Harley ended her exclamation with a raspberry, grinning wide at the laugh she got for it.

They finished their meal over light conversation, turning the television on to let the news play in the background and waiting to see if anymore stories ran about their recent theft. Luckily, there was not a single mention of it -- let alone anything to implicate them, and they shared a smirk and a high-five over the success. As Ivy gathered their dishes and poured her second cup of coffee, it was Harley's turn to cling to her back and press kisses to her neck.

"Can I let the boys out for couch time?" She asked sweetly, purposefully kissing the sensitive spot on Ivy's neck.

"Oh alright." She sighed before quickly tagging on, "But only for an hour. I don't want the entire apartment smelling like fur."

Skipping gleefully to the bathroom, Harley threw the door open and cheered, "Hiya babies! Ready for breakfast and cuddles?"

Bud and Lou toppled over each other in a race to get to the blonde first. They collided with the door frame and then with her legs, knocking her on her ass and then rushing to aggressively lick at her face. Harley laughed all the while, accepting their slobbery affections with delighted laughs and coos. She let them bid her good morning a few minutes longer then stood to pull brown paper bags of raw meat out of the fridge. The cutely decorated bowls with their names on them were proudly filled with the meat and she didn't understand how she ever let them eat off the floor before. The Joker didn't care so long as the boys were ready to tear off someone's arms, but Harley had all the time in the world for them now and made sure they were as pampered as could be. Comfy beds, clean water, new collars, and all the toys she could steal from the pet store before the cops arrived. She watched them tear into the breakfast lovingly, sitting on the floor between them to scratch behind their ears and stroke their heads.

Once they finished, Harley tossed their bowls in the sink with the other dishes and made her way to the couch, plopping down beside Ivy and patting her lap. "C'mere boys! Mama Ivy's bein' nice and lettin' ya come watch the weather with us!"

"Since when did I become their mother?" Ivy asked in mild disgust as the hyenas clambered onto the couch. Bud seated himself directly in Harley's lap, blocking her vision, while Lou nosed his way under her arm to lay against her side. With a little persuasion, Bud finally lay down -- but with his body in Harley's lap and head in Ivy's. She looked down at him with a grimace that he seemed impervious to as he only rolled to his back to show his belly and let his tongue flop out of his mouth.

"Awww," Harley looked to her girlfriend with misty eyes, "see? Buddy loves you! He just wants you to pet'em, Red! The boys were never this lovey-dovey to Mistah J!" Pamela looked from the wild animal to Harley, the unimpressed look on her face never changing. Batting her eyelashes, Harley mentioned sweetly, "Doesn't mother earth include all the livin' creatures too?"

"Ugh, whatever. This does not mean I like them or completely approve of them even being here. If we get caught and have to pay a pet fee, I'm not helping you." Slowly -- and begrudgingly -- Pamela lowered her hand to Bud's chest to gently scratch at it, the motion causing one of his hind legs to kick wildly of it's own volition. 

"Uh-huh, of course, Pam-a-lam."

Harley let her keep the scowl on her face as she pet the hyena, recognizing that this happened most mornings and that in a few hours when Pamela would fall asleep she'd be cuddled up with the furry beasts she claimed to loath so much. It warmed Harley's heart to see them all piled together on the couch, snoozing for hours on end or until the boys needed time outside. She was certain that they were feeling the effects of having a home now too. They would still wait with stiff fur and gnashing teeth at the door any time someone would walk by, would still bow up and stand between Harley and anyone who'd approach them on their evening walks, and they would still try and take bites out of random passersby anytime they could get the heads out the door, but they seemed more content to just laze about the apartment or chew a bone in the corner. They were afraid of Ivy at first, something she acknowledge was due to their animal instincts recognizing her as poison and a threat, but both parties gained the other's trust over time.

And as much as Ivy liked to complain about them, she was always willing to help Harley with them. Bath times, getting more food, taking them out for walks, and even sometimes in a generous enough mood to throw toys for them. Harley would never mention it, but she had caught the meta-human in a heated game of tug-a-war with the hyenas a few weeks ago where she not only talked to them as they played but also laughed when they managed to get the toy back. Hearing Ivy -- someone who had despised them since they first came into her life -- cheerfully rewarding them with pets and soft 'good boy's had warmed Harley's heart to new extremes. It was a change, one that went so far out of her comfort zone, but she was trying. For Harley.

They remained glued to the couch cushions for the duration of the morning news and the talk show that followed, conversation drifting off as Harley became engrossed in an interview with Bruce Wayne and Ivy lay snoring with Bud on her chest.

"I wonder how Selina goes out on dates with him." Harley wondered aloud, "He's gotta get recognized everywhere he goes." Thinking on it for a moment before letting her mind wander away again, she reached down to tap the legs slung over her lap and asked, "Hey Red, you awake?"

"No." Ivy answered slowly, a long yawn following it.

"We should go out on a date."

"When?"

"Tonight? Dinner and movie?"

"Does it have to be tonight?"

"Ya got plans?"

"Yes, sleeping." Harley playfully rolled her eyes and watched Ivy sit up with a devious smirk. "Maybe some other less than boring activity in bed."

Leaning over to peck her on the lips, Harley grinned while saying, "Well why don't we cross one of those things off the list? Think your evenin' would open up then?"

Slowly, Pamela reached over to hold the back of Harley's neck and bring her closer until their noses touched. Staring at the blonde with half-lidded eyes, she whispered, "I think I can be convinced."

Getting ready for their night out was a task that took far longer than Harley wished it would, at least for her. 

She was most certainly not at all envious of Ivy still lounging naked in bed, waiting her turn to put on the makeup that would take her all of five minutes to do. Harley, on the other hand, had to grumble to herself and avoid stepping on Bud and Lou's paws as she painted her acid-washed skin in ungodly amounts of foundation and concealer. It was a process she had come to master over the years but could never improve her speed; it took time to make sure she evenly coated her face, neck, chest, arms, and hands. Normally, Harley would opt for all of these areas so she could wear the low-cut, revealing blouses she adored so much -- but the mounting frustration had her reaching for a turtleneck sweater instead.

Pausing to study her now peachy face, Harley pouted at her reflection and then down to the glasses resting on the counter. God, I really look like Harleen now. She thought to herself as she pulled the turtleneck over her head, checking afterwards for any smears in her foundation. It was strangely off-putting to see herself like this again -- to see herself looking normal. It put a pit in her stomach and an ache in her chest, things she couldn't decide were from discomfort or grief. They only grew deeper as she leaned forward to study her face closer, eyes trailing the scars on her face that were still visible even under pounds of makeup. It was eerie to think that once upon a time, there hadn't been a blemish on her face and that was something she took great pride in. She had been beautiful then, not like now.

Ghastly, inhuman, _wrong._

Looking into the blue eyes staring back at her, Harley looked at Harleen and wondered where she would be if she had survived past the age of twenty-four. 

Would she have her own practice like she dreamed of? A bestselling book about being a doctor to the criminally insane? A stable job, a nice home and garden, a retirement plan? Someone to share that retirement plan with? Would she walk with her head held high and a ring on her finger, sure of herself and her talents and unyielding in the face of opposition? Would she be happy? Would she feel relief at being free of her awful past, that she got out of a hellhole and finally got the life she deserved? Would she be able to heal from all of her past regrets? Would she save herself from the doubts plaguing her mind? Could she be her own hero, her own savior, instead of bouncing around from broken person to broken person looking for someone to save her from herself?

In a world created to break her down and shatter her mind, could she pull through and be stronger than the person looking at her in the mirror now?

Harley's eyes burned, not willing to fight the bitter tears when she finally turned her head away. It didn't come often, but when this unimaginable pain bloomed in her chest it would burn her down to the core. It made her skin feel itchy like it had right after she stepped out of the acid, like at any moment it would peel from her flesh and she'd be reduced to nothing but sinew and nerve. It felt wrong -- she felt wrong. Everything felt wrong. Everything _was_ wrong.

Bud and Lou whined at her feet, both stretching up to lick her hands and nudge her in the thigh or hip. Sinking to the bathroom floor with them, Harley wrapped her arms around the two hyenas and hugged them tightly as more tears tracked down her face. Gripping their coarse fur and letting them nuzzle into her face calmed her down and grounded her. She let them comfort her a few moments longer before standing to fix her makeup one last time and grabbing her glasses. 

Staring at her reflection, Harley slid the specs into place and said quietly to the woman looking back at her, "You're Harley-fucking-Quinn. And you're here."

Striding across the small apartment and into the bedroom, Harley leaned against the door frame and called to the woman in bed. "Your turn, Daffo-doll."

Ivy stretched out and said with a long sigh, "Are you sure we have to go out tonight? I'm personally a fan of just staying right here until the end of time."

"Yep! Movies and dinner! Normal people date night stuff! Get yer pants on and lets G-O out tha D-O!" The redhead rolled her eyes with a smile and slowly sat up. As she did so, Harley watched in wonder as the green of her skin seemed to fade starting from her forehead and spreading down, exposing pale skin to the artificial lights of the room. "Cheater..." Harley breathed, still in awe at the sight. Seeing Poison Ivy become Pamela Isley was an extremely rare sight, one that Harley was sure she had seen the most out of anyone. Deep down, part of her wished to see it more. It wasn't that she disliked the green skin, but when Pamela let it fade and the light freckles on her face, shoulders, and chest shine through, Harley felt like swooning. For a woman who absolutely oozed sex-appeal, they made her seem so soft and cute.

Pushing herself off the bed and into Harley's arms, Ivy pulled her into a heated kiss and mentioned lowly, "You know, I think normal people have date nights _in_ too. Doesn't that sound so much better than braving the snow and wind and perpetually annoying meat-bags that wander the city?"

"I was with you until you said the phrase 'meat-bags'. It kinda ruined the sexy moment." Harley admitted with a groan before stealing another kiss and backing away, "So nope! We go out!"

Sure enough, it took Ivy a grand total of thirteen minutes to get ready, dressed in two thick sweaters, heavy coat, scarf, hat, and her own pair of glasses. Harley playfully asked her if she was really that cold and cackled at the glare shot her way as a reply. They opted for a cab instead of the car they stole as they didn't want any unwanted attention and were off to the movie theater downtown. They bickered during the ride about what movie to see, trying to convince the other to see their own preferred film before settling on a different movie entirely. 

The crowded theater put Ivy on edge and should have done the same to Harley, but she was more focused on getting good seats than making sure people didn't double-take at them. Despite the worry, their movie-going experience went without a hitch and as they exited the building and onto the sidewalk they walked hand-in-hand while laughing and chatting about the movie's ending. A woman's shrill voice caught Harley's attention and she craned her neck away to watch a man pursue a young woman away from the front doors of the theater, the girl clearly in distress. 

"Hey," She nudged Ivy and jerked her head at the situation, "wanna do the ol'hair-care routine?"

Ivy scoffed at the idea but watched the scene like a hawk. "You know I hate that stupid plan." She grimaced again when Harley's drink was pushed into her hand suddenly.

"And yet ya can't deny it's success rate!" Harley left her girlfriend behind to briskly walk towards the two strangers, clutching her bag of half-eaten popcorn to her chest. As she neared them she could hear the man insisting that they see a movie together, the woman quickly shooting down his offers and begging him to leave her alone. "Oh! Tiffany! I thought that was you!" Harley shouted with a broad grin, jogging the short distance left and throwing her arms out, "Long time no see, whatcha been up to?" Just as she drew closer, she let herself catch on the tips of her toes and threw her popcorn at the man's face while saying, " _Oops!_ "

"The fuck do you think you're doing you dumb broad?!" He yelled as he wiped away butter and kernels.

"Sorry mistah!" Harley said innocently, "I'm _real_ clumsy, see? Just another one of those dumb blonde things, ya'know? Gee, ya sure do look like a hot mess now! Might wanna go clean that up!"

He grit his teeth and stepped forward to tower over Harley and say with clenched teeth, "You think you're really fuckin' funny huh? Stupid bitch, I'll show you a hot fucking mess!"

Just then, Ivy appeared behind her and grabbed her arm, pulling her away and putting herself between them. "Oh," She said with a flat tone and bored expression, "there you are. I was wonder where you went. I turned around and you were gone and-- oh no." She lifted the drink and dumped it on the man's head unceremoniously and dropped the empty cup on him for good measure. Harley bit her lip to keep from howling with laughter as Ivy put her hands up in an exaggerated shrug and said, "Oh no, what a turn of events; I tripped. Wow, I'm _sooo_ sorry. I guess redheads are clumsy too. Who would have thought."

"I'll fucking kill you!" The man shouted, balling his fists and getting in Ivy's face.

She didn't even blink as he did, standing a little straighter to make clear the fact that she had a good half a head on him. "Try me." She muttered, unfazed by his anger and threats.

They stood chest to chest for a few moments, long enough for Harley to wonder if she needed to take him out at the knees, before the man turned away and growled out, "Stupid fucking bitch in heels..."

"She's actually wearin' flats, ya micro-peewee!" Harley called after him as he angrily stormed away. Letting herself laugh at their success, she turned her attention to the woman that was being harassed and said, "You alright over there, doll-face? That guy was a real piece of work!"

The woman nodded and thanked them as a group of people walked up to her and greeted her. Making sure she got safely inside the theater with her friends, Harley gave Ivy two thumbs up and said, "Yer actin' could use some work but ya did a great job anyways, Dande-lioness!"

"Next time I'm just going to deck him in the face." Ivy rolled her eyes but smiled. Her expression changed instantly and she narrowed her brows while turning her head to look down the street. "Something's going on." She said quietly, "The plants sheltering underground are being disturbed."

Harley instantly groaned and said, "I knew we shoulda went to the place on the east side! Gotham Central Bank's a few blocks away, someone's probably tryin' to rob it. Probably Two-Face, the money grubby bastard."

"No, I don't think it's Harvey. He's insane, but he's not stupid; he wouldn't hit the downtown bank on a weekend during peak traffic. Whoever it is is either an idiot or asking for trouble from Batman."

"Could be Bane or Croc then. They ain't the brightest sociopath's at the lunch table and last I heard they both had some scores to settle with Batsy."

An abrupt explosion cut off their conversation and Harley instinctively threw herself at Ivy. It was the first in a chain reaction that ran down the street, parked cars and some even in motion blowing up within seconds of each other and sending all manners of debris flying. The two were flung to the ground and just managed to crawl behind a concrete fountain when the glass of the ticket box erupted out where they had previously been. Their hiding spot put them back in front of the street and directly by the worst of the carnage, body parts and metal and stone littering the area before them. Car alarms blared, people screamed for help or for mercy and cried out for family and friends, more minor explosions faded off into the background.

And atop the symphony of chaos, a laugh.

Harley's hands immediately curled into fists and her stomach dropped into her feet. Everything around her seemed to fade away as she listened to The Joker laugh at the pandemonium he caused.

He was suppose to be in Arkham. The morning news didn't say anything about him breaking out. Did he just bust out? How did he do it without sending the whole city into lockdown? How did he manage to do something of this magnitude so fast? Why would he do something this grand right after escaping? Was he taunting Batman? Was he taunting her? Did he know she was here?

"Harley."

She snapped back to reality to look Ivy in the eyes. For a brief second, her mind paused. They needed to leave, to fade into the crowd of people running for their lives and get as far away from this hellhole as possible.

_But..._

"I'm going to kill him."

"What?! Harley, we need to leave! I can't fight Joker right now! And when Batman shows up we'll be royally fucked!"

"I know." She said as she stood and threw her glasses off, "That's why I'm gonna do it."

Harley turned and ran towards the laugh, Ivy's shouts getting lost in the madness. 

All Harley could think about now was staring at herself in the mirror, staring at Harleen. Earlier in the evening, she had mourned the normal life Harleen could have had if not for The Joker, but now she was enraged that she couldn't have even a semblance of a normal life without him coming back to haunt her as Harley. He loomed in the dark corners of the apartment, in the silence and stillness of the night, in her dreams and her nightmares, in the back of her mind like the ghost of Harleen. And now he was right there, real this time, and not expecting her to be coming for him. She'd get him before he could get her again.

The rage filling her chest and mind was from the rooted hatred she always had for him. It was easy to ignore and push aside when she was under his thumb and manipulation, but there was no denying it now. The anger and grief of him taking advantage of her, of ruining her life, of convincing her to break him out the first time, the way he guided her into the vat of acid, how he subdued her and made her doubt herself for so many years. How she let him do it all. And now, how he dared intrude on her life, on what was suppose to be her happily ever after, her dream, her normal life, her normal date night with her partner who loved her.

A piece of rebar that had been stabbed into the door of a car was yanked out as she ran. He was close now, and there was no real plan in Harley's mind aside from breaking his neck.

She crouched behind a toppled slab of concrete and glanced over it to watch him parade around the steps of the bank with a pistol in his hand. He held something -- a severed head, she realized -- in his other hand and spoke animatedly with it. Grabbing a nearby loose brick, Harley chucked it over her hiding spot and watched him turn to face the noise it made.

"That you, Bats?" He called out, "You're early for once! A good thing too, I was starting to get bored!"

The Joker stepped closer to the thrown object and Harley leapt over the concrete, dashing up to him and swinging the rebar against his head. He stumbled to the side from the harsh _CRACK_ and dropped both the head and gun, dropping to one knee and bringing a hand up to touch the bleed. His head turned slowly to look at Harley and his smile dipped for just a moment before it spread into that unnaturally wide grin of his.

"Oh! Harley-girl! It's you!" Joker got to his feet and observed the blood on his hand. "Your backhand has gotten sloppy." Harley's chest was heaving with every breath she took and she readied herself for another strike. "Now now, is that anyway to say hello? I mean after all, you did leave me to rot in that cell for so long! Don't you think that you owe me an apology?"

"Oh I owe you somethin' all right, this pipe in your _fuckin' throat!_ " She shouted and took another swing. Joker stepped out of it's way and shook his head with a _tsk._

"You can't be serious, Harl! Trying to kill me? Hah!" He leaned in and whispered, "You haven't got the guts, puddin'." Letting out a scream of anger, Harley readied her weapon and lunged forward only to be caught by something around her ankle and lifted away in time to avoid a detonation to the face. She whipped her head around to see Ivy -- green skinned and pissed -- with her hands outspread as more vines burst from a manhole to shield them. "I should have known you'd bring the jolly green bitch with you!" Joker called out, "She never lets us have fun anymore, does she?"

"Harley!" Ivy said through grit teeth, "We need to _go_. _Now._ "

"Not before I knock his teeth out!" 

"Are you ladies fighting over there? I hear lots of yelling!" Joker suddenly appeared atop the vines and peered down at them. "Well if it isn't my favorite female empowerment duo! Long time no see, Pam! Bribing Harley with enough calamine lotion to stay around?"

With a grunt of effort, Ivy sent him cartwheeling backwards as her plants shook him off and then slithered around to point threateningly at him. They struck him before he could get back to his feet, tearing his purple suit and drawing blood with each strike. Even with how vicious the attacks were, Harley could see their movements slowing down and growing sloppier with each strike. She looked back to Ivy and gasped. The green of the metahuman's skin had seemed to fade into a sickly olive hue and looked visibly rougher, like the wilting petals of a cut flower.

The Joker dodged the sluggish attacks and picked up his pistol before leaping onto an overturned car. "Oh my," He said with false worry, "I'd say you're looking a little green, Pammy, but truthfully you're starting to look like you've gone past your expiration date. Feeling under the weather? Or just _really_ feeling the weather?"

"Fuck you." Ivy spat. She let the bulk of her plants retreat but sent a single one out like a whip to wrap around his wrist and bring the hand with the gun up into the air.

"Aww, did I strike a nerve? I do apologize, after all I simply must thank you for taking such great care of my Harley while I was away!" Joker grinned at how angry his words made Ivy and he continued, "But I'll be having her back now; don't mind her temper, she gets like that when she's been without me for too long. You know what that's like, right? Like when you go too long without eye-fucking anything with a pulse!" The vine went from his wrist to his neck and squeezed the breath out of him. "Another nerve?" He gasped out.

Harley's grip on the rebar made her knuckles turn white and she walked towards the still grinning man with it raise above her head. "This is for every single fuckin' thing you did to me!" She bellowed, rearing back to strike.

The vine around Joker's neck suddenly retreated and he dropped to one knee gasping for air. He looked passed Harley and said with a grimace, "You're late, Bats!" Spinning on her heels, Harley turned to see Batman swoop down and fling batarangs in Ivy's direction to slice through what little green she had under her control. Ivy dodged his flying kick and pulled a root up from the ground to twist around his arm and flip him onto his back. A sudden gunshot from right beside her ear stunned Harley and she jerked back to watch Joker take potshots at the two with his pistol. He stared at Harley and bellowed a laugh, "Don't you just love this guy?! I kill half the fucking block and the first thing he does is come to my defense! What a champ!" Swinging in response, the rebar hit Joker in the chest with a grotesque crunch and then in the face to cut his laugh off. He fell onto his hands and knees and stared up, blood pouring from his broken nose and busted lip. "You sure you want to keep coming after me when your babysitter is about to be turned into soylent green?"

Glancing over to watch Batman take another swing at Ivy and realizing how sluggish her movements became, Harley's body both froze in place and twitched in their direction. Ivy caught sight of her and yelled with an outstretched hand, "Harley!"

"Mommy's calling." Joker giggled.

Giving him one last good wollap over the back of the head, Harley charged straight at Batman and struck him in the back with her weapon. It broke against his armor and he turned on her slowly, completely unfazed by the attack and staring down at her. One of his legs swung out and connected with her bruised hip to nearly send her to the ground, but Harley grit her teeth and only let her stance wobble for a moment. She bent over backwards to dodge his fist before vaulting herself up using her hands and kicking him in the jaw, stunning him long enough to dash over to Ivy to grab her hand and pull her down a nearby alley. They sprinted, shoving trash cans and litter after themselves to try and deter the caped crusader from following them. Harley lead them down corners and back alleys, her lungs burning and her voice panting loud. When they finally slowed down and she caught her breath, she recognized that she wasn't hear herself gasping heavily, but Ivy.

Finally getting a good look at her, Harley's heart clenched. Pamela swayed on her feet, her eyelids heavy and her head hanging slightly. Her skin was still that sickly color and even her hair seemed to lack its shine. When she lifted her head, a thick trail of blood ran freely from one nostril. "Oh god..." Harley whispered, "Pammy..."

"'m fine." She said hoarsely, taking a stumbling step into the blonde and leaning into her. She started to completely fall over but caught herself and admitted, "I'm gonna pass out..."

"I'll get you home, I swear." Harley murmured. She fastened Ivy's scarf around her neck and covered as much of her face as she could before pulling an arm over her shoulder and leading them out of the alley. The street they were spat into was crowded, filled with citizens frantic and rushing to escape the area. The two blended right in, looking like just another set of injured bystanders fleeing for help. Harley would tense and be ready to lift Ivy into her arms every time a group of police officers ran by on their way to assist in the fight, and she nearly broke one's nose when he grabbed her by the arm and motioned for them to get in line for a taxi out of the area. They moved faster than expected and ended up in the back of a random citizen's SUV with five other strangers giving their addresses to the driver. She opted to give him the address of the building across the street from theirs and tried to settle in. Despite how unsettling the experience was, Harley was thankful for the ride. She didn't think her hip would last long enough to walk home, let alone down another block.

They were the third stop and one of the remaining passengers tried to follow them out to help carry Ivy but Harley refused. She snapped a little too aggressively, judging by the confused and hurt look on the do-gooder's face, but risking Pamela in the arms of a stranger was the last thing Harley would ever do. Her skin had gradually returned to it's pale, 'normal' complexion but she still faded in and out of consciousness. Waking up confused and being touched by someone other than Harley would probably send her into a similar state of hysteria as when she would wake up screaming from nightmares about Jason Woodrue.

Harley waited until the SUV turned the block to cross the street and enter their apartment building, hoping that for once their kind yet nosy neighbor would be busy elsewhere and not ask too many questions. The flight of stairs had always been a point of complaint for Harley, but she took them two at a time as she carried Ivy up and into the safety of their home. Bud and Lou were losing their minds behind the bathroom door but she ignored it, making a beeline for their bedroom and carefully lowering Ivy onto it. She unlaced her boots and threw off her layers of clothing, leaving her in her underwear and peeling back the blankets and sheets to tuck her in. She left for just a moment to get a glass of water from the kitchenette and placed it on the bedside table before coming to sit on the bed with her partner. Her fingers combed gently through Ivy's hair and she watched the meta-human breathe shallowly in her sleep.

This was all her fault. She should have listened to Ivy. She wasn't thinking clearly at all when she ran towards Joker, running on a sudden blood-lust born from pain. Nothing else had mattered to her in that moment -- her own well-being didn't matter -- but lucky for her Poison Ivy was there to once again prove that she had enough humanity left to care enough for the both of them. It was just another reminder that no matter how much Harley let Joker control her actions and torture her head, Ivy was always right there to catch her when she fell. This time it just really bit Harley in the ass.

And thinking on it, she wondered how many times it had ended like this that she just hadn't noticed. How many times over the years had Ivy risked it all to help and save Harley only to come out hurt worse in the end? How many times would Ivy grin (or most likely, grimace) and bear it without receiving anything in return before she finally snapped and turned her back on Harley? How many times was Ivy going to have to save Harley from herself? How much longer could Harley let her?

It all brewed frustrated tears behind Harley's eyes and she wiped at them futilely. She promised herself to give back and be better, and yet here she was fucking it all up and going back to basics.

"Stupid..." She muttered to herself.

Ivy shifted under a touch and seemed to mumble something back. Harley leaned closer and touched her face, getting the other woman to open her eyes and whisper out more clearly, "That movie...was stupid. I want my money back..."

Harley laughed and finally let her tears flow. She reached down to press kisses into Ivy's face. "You didn't even pay for the tickets though, Red. Date night was on me, remember?"

"Don't care. I want that hour and fifty-seven minutes of my life back."

"I'm so sorry." Harley sniffed, "I should have listened to you but I didn't and now you're hurt and you were right I'm too impulsive and scattered and--"

"Harley, can we fight about this later?" Pamela asked, cracking an eye open to look up at her, "Don't get me wrong, I _love_ to hear how right I am, but I'd rather do this when I don't feel like my head's going to explode."

"I kinda wanted to do it now so you'd be too tired to yell at me..." Harley admitted softly.

Ivy made a face and sat up on her elbows slightly. "Why would I yell at you? When I said fight, I meant it more as a civil yet strongly worded disagreement between two intelligent adults in a stable relationship. I'm not going to raise my voice at you for wanting to kill The Joker."

"You ain't?"

"No. Harley, just because now was a really bad time doesn't mean I'm going to forbid you from doing it again. Am I pissed? Yeah, but I'll get over it. Will I probably be more angry later? Definitely, but right now I'm just tired. I get it, I really do." Ivy brought a hand up to hold Harley's and she said sincerely, "If that were me and I came across Woodrue, I would absolutely lose my mind and try to kill him. And if you got caught in the crossfire and hurt...I honestly don't know what I'd do. But I'm okay and I'll be okay, I just need some time, okay? I'll be fine, I promise."

Harley was quiet for a moment before she sniffed again and mentioned, "You kinda scared the shit outta me; I've never seen you like that before."

"It honestly scared me too. I've never felt so disconnected and weak before. This winter is harsher than any of the ones I've been through."

"But ya still managed to fight off Joker _and_ Batman, so how lame are they that they couldn't get you down at your worst? How's that fer losin' our edge?"

Pamela smirked, "You do have a point there." She inched up to lay against Harley's chest and slipped an arm around her waist. "I want to be there when you do kill him. I want to help you. It just wasn't the right time. You'll show him what you're capable of, you're Harley-fucking-Quinn, right? It's only a matter of time." They lay together and embraced, basking in the warmth of one another in comfortable silence. After a while, Ivy sighed and murmured, "I'm tired...gonna sleep a little."

Harley pulled her closer, clinging to her and trying to hide both of them away from the world and the chill it spread throughout their room. She never wanted to leave this moment, content to just lie here for forever and ignore everything else. That she was sure of. Her own eyes grew heavy and she let herself drift off into sleep with Pamela's breath on her cheek.

There was one other thing she was certain of. 

She was going to make The Joker hurt like she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well hello there ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_
> 
> sorry i've been away for so long!!! life has been hard, but i am okay!!! i wasn't initially planning on going past chapter two, but i got struck with some more inspiration and decided to continue!! oh, and remember how i said i originally had chapter two end on an unhappy, angsty note? well, good news!!! chapter four is going to have an even worse one!!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ so perhaps that isn't good news!!! and is also sort of a spoiler!!! but consider this your fair warning!!! if you came here for the hurt/comfort and soft things, i am sorry!!! but it is now pain time™. if you're worried about it, i will update the tags as i post the chapter, so be sure to heed them!!! thank you all for your continued support and kind comments, they have been a bright spot in a dark time!!!


	4. Until The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I bet the sunrise is nice from up here. Stay a while and watch it with me, Red."

"Okay, so the fried potatoes cakes I can understand. But what's with all the _cheese?_ "

Harley looked up from grocery duty and glanced from the cheese tray in her hand to the full block in the bag before her to her girlfriend. "Ya'know, I'm sure there's some symbolic and religious justification, but I really don't remember. I just remember there always being cheese around Hanukkah." Ivy's grimace didn't wane as her eyes flicked over to the island and to the jelly donuts resting there in all their delicious looking glory. Harley followed her gaze and quickly said, "Same with those! I swear! There was always a shitton'ov cheese and jelly donuts!"

"Oh there's gonna be a shit-ton of something coming out of you after eating all the cheese. And I know you gave me the recipe for the kugel but...are you certain it's suppose to be sweet? The thought of egg noodles with raisins is just..."

"Hey! Don't be mean to Granny Quinzel's secret kugel recipe from the old country! Kugel is a delicacy; you're just uncultured!"

Ivy chuckled and shook her head, turning back to the pan of oil and potatoes to flip one over. "At least we've got potatoes."

"Not just taters, Daffo-doll, latkes!" Harley finished putting the cold items away and moved to a new bag, starting to pull it's contents out before stopping herself and saying while gauging the redhead's reaction, "So...you know how last time we went out you said there was one thing I couldn't get?"

"That could be a great number of things, peanut, but by that tone I don't know if I should be worried for you or for me."

"Well, you weren't there to tell me no and they had one in your size so I thought--"

Immediately, Pamela whipped around and shrilly said, " _Harleen Frances Quinzel,_ you did _not!_ "

Harley tried to grin but it didn't quite get there as she slowly raised the sweater in question for the world -- or their apartment -- to see. It was dark blue with patterns running horizontally across the chest and arms that were created from a bunch of tiny six pointed stars. On the front, a picture of a cat wearing a kippah with the phrase _'Happy Hanukkat'_ in bold font underneath it. Harley stepped over to hold it out for her girlfriend to take -- which she didn't -- so she instead prayed to still be alive in ten seconds and yanked the thing down over her head. While Ivy struggled to free herself from the sweater, Harley returned to the bags and said, "But don't worry! They we're havin' a buy one get one sale and had one in my size too!" The second sweater was also blue, but a much brighter shade and with the silhouette of a unicorn on the front and a Star of David behind it trailing a gradient of yellows and golds. Tinier stars littered the rest of the front and back, and across the chest it said in cursive font _'Jewnicorn'_. Harley had just finished pulling hers on as Ivy finally struggled her arms through the sleeves and stood with a sour face and folded arms. "Awwww!!" Harley cooed," Ya look so cute, sugar bean! We should take a picture!"

"Absolutely not!" Pamela growled, "The last thing I need is physical evidence that I was ever in this thing." She let Harley giggle behind her hand for a few moments in silence before saying, "I'll let you laugh it up now, but just know that you're getting yours later, Quinn."

Skipping closer to hug the taller woman, Harley squeezed her tight and cheered, "She's wearin' it and she didn't kill me! This really is the best Hanukkah ever! I might be gettin' nothin' fer Christmas, but it's worth it!" She paused and sniffed the air before sobering and saying seriously, "Pammy, are you burning my latkes?"

"Shit! Motherfuck--"

A knock on the door sent Bud and Lou off their respective cushiony beds by the couch and straight to the source of the noise, Bud leading the way and letting out a low pitched whoop at the closed door while Lou paced behind him with his head lowered to the ground. Both hyenas stood on high alert as they watched the door and both whooped again at another knock. Harley skipped over and knelt down beside them to pet at their stiff fur and say, "It's okay, babies! It's just Auntie Kitty! I hope..." She muttered that last part under her breath and stood to peer out the peephole, cheering loudly and opening the door. "Hiya, Kitty!" She greeted Selina with a wide smile and open arms, completely forgetting about the territorial animals behind her and yanking the other woman in quickly.

Selina closed the door and stood pressed up against it as Bud and Lou flanked her to sniff at her legs and she made a displeased face at Harley. "They're not going to flip out at the smell of Isis on me, are they?"

Crouching down to loop her arms around their necks and pull them into her side, Harley planted kisses on each of their faces then said, "Nope! Budsie and Louie actually like cats more than dogs! Hyenas are closer to felines than canines, see? They just don't recognize ya cuz they haven't seen ya in a while. Give'em a minute to give ya a once over and they'll be all over ya!"

"Like I want that..." Selina drifted off to take in Harley's sweater. The blonde stretched it out so she could see it better and the dark haired woman cringed in response. "Oh, Harley. _Why._ " Biting her lower lip and pointing behind her to the kitchen, Selina followed her gaze and burst into hysterics. She just managed to wheeze out between laughs, "Jesus Christ on a cracker! Ivy what the _fucking hell_ are you wearing and how have you not combusted from rage yet?!"

Pamela pointed with a pair of tongs threateningly and spoke lowly. "You say anything about this outside of this apartment and I will grow thistles in your throat."

"You know, I'm usually jealous of you and the looks you pull off but this is probably your best one yet." Selina snickered while wiping tears from her eyes.

Harley grinned and returned to her shopping bags to grab one and approach Selina with it held innocently before her. "I'm glad you think so, 'cause I got you one too!"

It was Pamela's turn to cry with laughter as Selina stood stiffly in a a white sweater with a golden menorah on it and the phrase 'Oy To The World' above it in blue. Harley smiled as she just managed to take a selfie with the two other women in the background, quickly saving it to her cloud before either of them could snatch her phone and delete it. They stood around in the tiny kitchen after that as Harley and Ivy finished cooking, talking casually about whatever and occasionally mentioning bits and pieces of criminal news they heard recently. They moved dishes around on the counters to make space for the ones coming out of the oven or off the stove; plates of latkes, the kugel Ivy still scrunched her nose at, the smallest cut of brisket Harley had ever seen, a pot with perhaps too much matzoh ball soup, and yet another package of jelly donuts that Harley insisted were necessary. Bud and Lou had to be exiled into the bedroom after one two many close calls with the food.

As they moved about fixing their plates, Selina commented, "I know you said this was a very exclusive holiday party, but is it really just the three of us? What happened to that blue man group reject you two would run around with?"

"You mean Livewire?" Ivy clarified, "She was only in Gotham for a short time while. She's probably back to being a pain in Superman's ass in Metropolis. It is a shame though, Leslie was pretty fun to have around."

Harley glowered at her girlfriend and snapped, "Oh yeah, super fun! I just _loved_ that part where she'd always try to get into your pants and try leavin' me behind!"

"Harley, everyone I've ever met has tried to get into my pants." Ivy said dryly.

"Yeah but you don't flirt back with everyone! Watching you two make doe-eyes and stare at each other's asses was torture, Red! Especially if she came back now! I'd probably deck'er in the face!"

"And I'd let you? I was being sarcastic when I said I thought she was fun, sweet pea, I honestly thought she had a shitty attitude and wasn't a fan of how she treated you either." Harley pouted and Pamela cocked a brow while saying stoically, "Do you seriously think that I'd flirt with her if she were here? In our home, on your holiday, right in front of you?"

Selina watched them go back and forth in amusement, standing aside with her plate and enjoying dinner and a show. "Flirt with me and tell me my ass looks great, Pam." She chimed in. "I want to see how pink Harls' face can get."

Pressing a swift kiss to Harley's flushed cheek, Ivy turned to sit at the island and scoffed while passing the dark-haired woman. "Oh please. Don't you have a boy-toy to tell you that? Or is it a bat-toy now? I can never keep them straight, you bounce back and forth between the two so often these days."

Perking up at the aforementioned playboy, Harley gasped and said, "You shoulda invited Brucie, Kitty!"

Ivy and Selina shared a look at the thought. "Honey, when I told him I was spending the evening with friends I don't think he pictured me doing Hanukkah in wanted criminals Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn's studio apartment wear godawful sweaters. Bruce is...understanding to an extent, but I don't think he'd be exactly over the moon at being in close quarters with members of Gotham's rogues gallery."

"That and we did kind of drug him and max out his credit cards a few Christmases ago, Harls. I don't think he'd be so willing to forgive and forget us accidentally pushing him down an elevator shaft."

"He tripped himself!" Harley insisted, "It's not my fault the guy's a big 'fraidy cat! Guess it's why he spends his dime on Selina now! I mean, ya are what ya eat, right?"

"Jesus Christ, Harley." Selina groaned while bringing her face into a hand. She lifted her head after a second and smirked at the blonde, "Okay, you know what, fine. I'll take that, it's a good joke. But you know another really good pussy joke I can think of?"

"Please, lets just enjoy this nice meal." Ivy pleaded, "Like this kugel! I don't hate it as much as I thought I would! And these _latkes,_ I think I did a damn good job--"

Harley pointed an accusing finger and narrowed her brows. "If yer fixin' to make a jab about Pammy and'er pussy willow lemme stop you right there and instead direct your attention to the 'eating your greens' joke instead."

"But that one's used all the time. Surely there's a gluten free joke somewhere in there."

"I dunno about that, but gimme a couple of minutes and I bet I'll have a good grass fed one!"

Pamela lowered her head to the island countertop to begin softly banging her forehead into it as the two continued their back and forth, less trying to one-up each other now and more enjoying watching the redhead squirm. They eventually relented and resumed the previous casual conversation as they ate until they were nearly sick. As Ivy put away the leftovers and put the dirty dishes to soak in the sink, Harley and Selina sat on the couch and over a dreidel on the coffee table as Harley explained the game to her. They were five rounds deep when Ivy joined them and it only last three more before they both declared Harley the winner and pushed her earnings -- a few pennies, a jelly donut, and a handful of raisins -- into her hands. Selina asked a few more questions about Hanukkah which Harley answered to the best of her ability. Some of them she couldn't, and realizing she didn't know and had to sheepishly pull out her phone to look it up had her feeling foolish and embarrassed. Her friend only waved her off. "Who needs old traditions? We make our own." Selina told her with a smile.

They opted to watch a movie then, talking through most of it and making fun of the acting and special effects. Eventually the TV was turned off and they resumed talking, and over time Pamela grew quiet from her spot in Harley's arms until she was dead to the world, still wearing her dumb sweater. The two remaining women spoke a little longer until Selina went silent in thought.

"He's planning something for New Years Eve."

Harley was confused for a moment. but her heart lurched up into her throat suddenly. Between the planning of Hanukkah and still trying to get Ivy a Christmas present, she had almost forgot about asking Catwoman with help tracking down The Joker. She had begged the thief to try and coax any information she could out of anyone she ran into either at the Iceberg Lounge or during her romps with the GCPD. Or better yet, from Batman.

"Oh?" Harley whispered back.

Selina shifted her legs underneath herself and eyed Ivy for a moment before continuing in a hushed voice. "Batman has been tracking some unusual patterns between his goons, and they all seem to either lead straight to the city center or in the area. He thinks the equipment is explosive, but he can't get any solid leads without letting Joker know he's watching."

Harley wracked her brain for a moment before saying, "I think I know what he's doing. They do the midnight ball drop every year off Wayne Tower, so he's probably going to fuck with it somehow. Make the ball fall off it's safety catch and crash into the crowd, blow it up, blow up the tower when it drops, blow up the crowd, blow up the surrounding area. Whatever it is, it's everything to do with what happens at midnight."

"Well, Batboy isn't going to rush in just yet. Not until he gets more information that is. But, I can tell you that he's got a stakeout coming up and intends to investigate up close."

"When?"

"Sunday. Wayne Tower closes it's business offices early so there's less of a chance for someone to blow his cover or get hurt in the crossfire. I'm assuming it's him and Batgirl; I haven't see the boy wonder around lately." Selina cut her eyes up to Harley's, "If Batman gets there before you do and throws Joker back in Arkham, what will you do then? Break in to kill him? You'd never make it back out and get thrown in yourself."

Harley didn't look away as she spoke. "Let Bat-brain poke his nose around for as long as he likes. If anything, knowing he's been there will lure Joker out of hiding. And then I'll kill'em."

"But you're willing to risk Batman still being there?" Selina sighed and folded her arms across her chest, "Harley, I'm with you on this, you know that, but I don't think you're considering all of the possibilities. I know you can fight them both off, but at the same time? Do you think both of us can? And Pam..." She trailed off and glanced down at the sleeping woman, "...well, I don't need to remind you what happened two weeks ago. She's not going to be able to save you, Harls. Not this time."

"I don't need her to!" Harley hissed in anger, "I know how shitty I've been, always havin' to be rescued and never doin' anything in return, but it's my turn now! This is my fight and I'm finishin' it, Ivy or not!"

Eyes softening, Selina asked quietly, "Do you really think Pamela will just sit by and let you go alone? She loves you, Harley, more than anything or anyone I've ever seen. She might be weak right now, but you and I both know she'd do whatever it takes to help you."

Bringing a hand up to stroke her girlfriend's hair, Harley looked down at her sleeping face and let her frustration wash away. "I know," She admitted, "but I'm scared, Kitty. I don't want her to get hurt because of me again. That's why I haven't told her about all this yet. We've been real good lately, maybe too good, but I don't wanna ruin it by fucking up what we've got. And I can't risk Joker fucking it up either. I wanna be the one to do the saving this time, ya'know?"

"I know. But please think about this a little bit more before you rush in. You're a knuckle-head, Quinn, but you're not an idiot. Don't let yourself die like one." Selina stood and stretched, pulling her sweater off and tossed it on the couch. "I'm heading home before I pass out like Pam. Thanks for the invite, it's been a real slice."

"Take some food with you!" Harley called after her.

"No, I don't think I will." Selina replied as she sauntered to the door, "Call me before you do anything. Night, Harls."

Harley sat on the couch stroking Ivy's hair for quite some time after, watching the woman as she slept and lost in thought. 

Selina did have a point. Using Batman as bait to get The Joker out was stupidly dangerous and would most likely end horribly for her. Logically, she should wait. Let Joker ruin Gotham's New Years Eve celebration, let him keep thinking he was safe wherever he ended up after it, and then strike him down. But waiting had never been a Quinzel trait, and it sure as hell wasn't a Quinn trait either. She could do it, she knew she could. She didn't have a choice.

Her fingers trailed down to trace a line from Pamela's forehead down her nose and lips, moving down and up the line a few times before caressing her cheek and feeling the warmth of her skin. Harley felt a swell of emotion in chest as she went through the motions, tears suddenly in her eyes and an awful feeling brewing in her stomach.

Selina had another point too. Harley wouldn't be alone no matter how hard she tried to be for this. Come hell or high water, Ivy was going to follow her there to make sure she'd be okay. And Harley hated it. She wanted Ivy to go back to being selfish and cruel and cold, not giving a damn about her or anything to do with her and just rolling her eyes and capable of forgetting about Harley and her antics. Maybe it would be easier that way. Maybe she wouldn't be so afraid of moving forward with this. But Harley knew why Ivy was dead-set in her ways too because they were the exact same, controlled by the same thing -- fear.

They had suffered from it long before they met; it's what caused them to become who they were today. Fear of the unknown lead Harleen to try and understand the psychology of the insane. Fear of failure silenced Pamela into submission and shattered her sense of self. After everything, they liked to think themselves above such a pointless emotion, but it only shifted into new forms. Fear of growing close to someone, fear of loss and loneliness, fear of being forgotten and made useless by time, fear of being forced to change their everything again in order to adapt and survive.

Harley refused to entertain the thoughts of trying to live a life without her partner beside her, but the fear swallowing her only put the unthinkable at the forefront of her mind. She even briefly wondered if this is what Pamela felt, what she thought, when she wished she'd just die. Were these thoughts the ones to plague her every waking moment? They were exhausting, so how did she ever manage them?

The dark wonders were swept away by the hand lifting to touch her cheek and Harley finally realized she had been dripping tears onto Ivy's face the entire time. Green eyes stared at blue and the redhead's lips formed the hint of a smile. "Penny for your bad thoughts, peanut?"

Harley said nothing, only nestled herself into Ivy's arms and hid away in her neck to squeeze out a few more tears and hold her tightly. When even that couldn't be enough Harley rose from the couch and into their bedroom, pulling Ivy with her. Their dumb sweaters were cast aside with the rest of their clothes and Harley let her mouth blaze a trail down green skin, yearning to hear and feel the woman under her. The content sighs and moans, the abrupt jolts of her hips and quaking in her thighs, the hand lightly gripping blonde hair, it all had a way of deafening the mounting fear in Harley's gut and replacing it with burning desire. It didn't matter what the future held, Ivy was here and alive and quickly arriving to orgasm.

As they lay under the sheets catching their breath and relaxing, Pamela lifted herself onto an elbow to study the blonde. "So, you know I was awake for that whole conversation." It wasn't a question, but even as a statement it wasn't necessary. 

"Yeah. And you don't like the plan."

"If you call whatever that is a plan, no. I don't."

"And I can't stop you or convince you not to come along."

Again, not a question or a statement that needed to be said. Not when they both knew the answer.

Pamela kissed her instead of replying, taking her face in her hands as she did so. When they parted, their foreheads pressed together and their noses bumped, the two looking back at one another in a silent understanding of the other.

"I'll never leave you, Harley." She said instead.

"I kinda wish you would." Harley said with a cracking voice and a pained smile, "It'd make all this a lot less shitty. And me a lot less guilty."

"Too bad," Ivy murmured, leaning down to say against her lips, "because you're stuck with me now, sweet pea." 

"I just don't want you to get hurt." Harley mumbled.

With a chuckle, Pamela took to playing with the ends of Harley's hair and replied, "I'd worry about yourself more, peanut. Nature always finds a way, but flesh and bone degrade and decay."

"You can just turn me into a houseplant. Make me into whatever the hell Georgia is, I wanna be man-eatin'."

Ivy hummed in consideration, dropping her hands to Harley's waist and poking fingers into her side, "But then you wouldn't be so ticklish, and where's the fun in that?" Harley giggled and pushed away from the assault, going lax when the fingers rose to stroke at the underside of her breasts and ribs. "We'll be okay." She said finally, lowering herself to rest her head on the blonde's chest.

"How do you know?" Harley asked softly.

"I don't. But I can hope we are. You said we're unstoppable, right?"

Harley smiled at that and brought her own arms around Pamela, holding her tightly and squeezing her eyes shut as she attempted to memorize everything about this moment. This was what she wanted to remember when she finally killed the demon haunting her. This was what she was doing it all for. "I love ya, Red."

Ivy smirked up at her and replied, "I love you too, sweet pea. Even if you made me wear that godawful sweater."

"Hey! They're cute and punny! You know you like them."

"Hm. I'm still going to hold them over your head though, you owe me." Harley shivered at the sultry look in Ivy's green eyes and she purposefully spread her legs apart. "Oh, you think you're getting something now? No no, silly girl. You didn't hear me right. You," A hand reached up to tug one of Harley's pigtails, making her gasp at the slight pain in her scalp, "owe _me._ "

Harley whined while bringing her hands to Ivy's hips, "Yeah but you just got off and I'm dyin' here. Please, Pammy, yer killin' me here."

"That is the point, you know. Hmm, but if it's going to be that much of an issue I guess I can wait just a little longer. It means you'll just have to work for it." Ivy dropped her head to the blonde's throat to kiss and bite, the hand not fisting into her hair traveling down between her legs. Harley moaned and pressed eagerly into the touch, her movements halted by another pull on her hair. "No," Ivy told her, "you don't get to beg and then be cheeky." 

"Fine, just please do somethin'. I'm--" She lost her words to two fingers sinking into her, letting out a long sigh of pleasure at the sensation and throwing her head back. The pace was slow, maddening almost, but Harley just bit her lip and tried not to complain. Ivy removed her hair ties and went from pulling her hair to rubbing her scalp, fingernails scratching gently at it just how she liked. It only made Harley more eager for her orgasm, and she finally broke her good streak and thrust her hips into Ivy's hand. Surprisingly, the redhead let her and actually traded her deeper thrusts for speed. The bed shifted lightly under new weight and Harley didn't look but groaned at the mental image of Pamela rising to her knees to get a better view. Instead, her hand left the blonde hair and her fingers stilled. Harley sat up to bitch about the abrupt stop but instead let out a loud laugh at the scene below her.

Pamela was trying desperately to shoo Bud off the bed, but the hyena seemed completely unfazed by their coitus and the hand forcefully shoving him towards the edge of the bed. "Get down!" Pamela hissed, clearly flustered by the interruption, "Fuck off! Go somewhere else!" Harley fell back onto the bed in tears, holding her stomach and no help to the situation whatsoever. "Harley!" Ivy practically shrieked, "Get your dumb dog out of here!"

"I'm sorry!" She wheezed, "I can't breathe!"

Ivy got up and wiped her hands on the bed sheets before heaving Bud into her arms. He seemed confused at the action, his tail gently wagging at the attention but his ears flattened to his head as he tried to gauge if this was a good or bad thing. Unceremoniously, Ivy chucked him out of the bedroom and slammed the door. She whirled on her heels to glare at Harley and said hotly, "Thanks for the help, Harls!"

"He just wanted to cuddle!" Harley said defensively as she wiped her eyes, "Buddie loves you, Pammy!"

"Well he can cuddle me when I'm not fingering you!" That set Harley off again and Ivy slouched onto the bed still grumbling, "I hate those fucking beasts. Why did I let you bring them again?"

"Cuz you love me! And you love them too, daffo-doll, don't deny it! Even if they are little voyeurs!" Harley sighed happily and said to herself, "Best Hanukkah I've ever had. To new traditions!"

Ivy rolled her eyes and returned to Harley's side, brushing her bangs off her forehead and finally saying with a smile and chuckle, "I'm glad you had a good time tonight. But maybe we don't make this a habit? I think I'd sooner try and have sex in the Batmobile then let your pets laze around while we're busy."

"Ooh, now there's a good idea for Christmas! How about we set up a camera to capture B-man's face when he opens the door? We could make it into a Christmas card!"

"Harley...honey... _no_. Please just stop talking so I can at least try and salvage the mood."

"Too late, I'm only thinkin' about gettin' it on in front of Batman now. Do ya think he fucks in the Batmobile?"

Ivy groaned and pressed her face into the pillow. "Why don't you ask Selina." Came her muffled reply.

Harley gasped and sat up again looking for her phone, "That is a great idea, Pammy! I wonder if he fucks the bats in there too, or if that's just in his Batcave."

"Please stop...I'm begging you."

"It's an honest question! Hey, sit up! I wanna discuss the logistics of this! I'm invested now!"

Spinning on her heels out of the way of a fist, Harley grit her teeth and put all her weight into the swing of her bat. The metal hit with a loud noise but didn't stun Batgirl for anymore than a few seconds and she ducked away from another swing easily. Glancing to the side, Harley watched Catwoman and Batman weave between each other dodging blows while also striking their own against two grunts trying in vain to beat them down. Batgirl's fist just missed the blonde's face and she knew she had looked away for too long, returning her attention to the teenaged hero and blocking another strike to the face with her arms.

It had turned into a shitshow the moment they arrived. Harley and Catwoman had hid outside Wayne Tower for hours scoping the giant mirror ball and waiting for a sign of either the caped crusader or the green-haired maniac. Nearing four in the morning with nothing, they agreed to take a quick peak inside the decorated sphere for more information only to walk into a trap set by Batman. He barely had time to accuse Harley of being up to something with The Joker when they were all jumped by the clown's goons. It turned into a mess of gunfire and crowbars after that. The whole area was a senseless jumble of dark catwalks and open holes that all lead to a forty-story drop, a terrain much more favored for the Bats and their tendency to hide in shadows to strike. There wasn't much surface area to stand on, and Harley found herself dodging more than attacking as she vaulted and swung over gaps. Somewhere in between it Harley took a batarang to the back and ended up face to face with Batgirl on a small platform.

The spot where it pierced her back throbbed with her heart but it was easy to ignore; it was a shallow wound with the worst being how it made her wince with the swings of her weapon. Harley leaned away from another fist and jabbed her own into the girl's ribs, finally stunning her and getting a harsh cough for it. Bringing her bat up and over, Harley brought it down on the hero's head and yelled, "Ain't it past yer bed time, Bat-brat?!" Batgirl dropped to one knee and Harley loomed over her full of adrenaline and rage. This wasn't how it was suppose to go. Batman ruined her plans yet again, and now that she had his little sidekick prone before her she was ready to ruin his plans too. "Say good-night, kiddo!" She bellowed while rearing back for another heavy swing.

She was knocked off her feet by Batman instead and he knocked the bat out of her hands and pinned her to the ground. Harley glared up at him but felt her heart lurch at the deadly look on his face, teeth clenched and face contorted into an unfiltered fury she had never seen before. His grip on her tightened to the point of pain and bruising -- something he had never done before -- and he growled in her face. "I'm not going to let you lay a hand on one of my wards _ever_ again, Quinn!"

One of his hands moved from holding her down by the shoulder to her throat and Harley's eyes bugged out. Her adrenaline kicked back in out of fear and she struggled in his grasp, kicking her legs and trying to hit him between the legs to no avail. "The...fuck!" She squeaked out. This was the most aggressive she had ever seen Batman, and quite frankly it scared the shit out of her. Her fingers went to his face to claw at his exposed chin, trying to get ahold of anything that could stun him or get him off of her. "Kitty..." She tried, but she could see Selina was busy with the two goons from before. Panicking now, Harley clenched her fists and gave up on what little they had left of the plan as she instead gave into the fear of the man above her. She was getting lightheaded as she reached to her ear and hit the device there, barely managing a wheeze at this point.

"...I...I-Ivy...pl-p...lea..."

Within seconds Batman as off of her and air came rushing back into her lungs. Harley sat up quickly and scrambled onto her knees, crawling pathetically away and searching for something to arm herself again. A green creeper slid up her leg to wrap around her waist and lift her to her feet, another dragging her bat back into her hands. Looking back, Harley watched as Batman struggled to free himself from a mess of writhing plants that had burst from one of the gaps in the floor. 

"Harley, what's going on?" Ivy called through the earpiece.

"B-man stickin' his nose in my business again and fuckin' everythin' up!" Harley's voice was raspy as she spoke, "Mistah J's nowhere to be seen either! Just a bunch of his--" She bent backwards out of the way of a goon and his crowbar, "--muscle!"

"I'm coming up! Hang on!"

"No! Stay hidden; it's fine! We're workin' on it!" Seeing an opportunity, Harley arched her bat with one hand and hit the grunt in the face hard enough to unhinge his jaw and send him toppling to the floor. At this point, Batman had pulled some little spray bottle from his utility belt that made the plants restraining him practically melt into putty and faced her again. Harley readied herself with her bat over one shoulder for another fight but Selina stepped between them suddenly and held her hands out.

"Easy!" She spoke, looking between the two, "You've got our intentions all wrong, handsome."

"Why are the Sirens helping The Joker?" Batman asked while stepping closer, ignoring Catwoman's attempts at diffusing the situation. "I can understand Harley Quinn, but what could he possible offer to Catwoman and Poison Ivy? And you," He finally looked down his nose at the latex-clad thief, "you used me for information, so whatever he's paying you must be good."

Selina scoffed and tilted her head to stare right back at him, "So much for the world's greatest detective; you've been off your game lately, darling. We all want the same thing here--"

"I'm tryin' to kill the bastard!" Harley yelled, pointing her bat at the hero while saying, "And yer in my way! Fuck off or I'll kill you too!"

The two readied themselves to rush past the still screaming Catwoman when a voice echoed through the darkness. "Now now! The holidays aren't for fighting!" Harley whipped her head around to try and find the source of the voice, but it seemed to be coming from everywhere all at once. "We're one big happy family here aren't we? Why don't we celebrate like one! After all, I have to show you how sorry I am for being late to this little get together! But first, no pets at the dinner table." A grappling hook shot out of the darkness, knocking Selina in the chest and making her stumble backwards. Harley turned to reach a hand out to her, mirroring Batman's own movements as both took one step closer to try and catch her when The Joker appeared from above them and struck her in the face with a bo staff. Selina was knocked off her feet then and fell backwards through an open panel in the side of the mirror ball, gone into the darkness of the night and open air in seconds.

"Selina!"

"Kitty!"

Joker peered out the side after her and whistled. He swiveled to face the two and said with a giggle, "I wonder if cats still land on their feet after tumbling such a long distance." Batman lunged at the clown and Joker slid between his feet to bring the bo staff across the back of his head. "I must say, Bats, I do love the Christmas presents you gave me!" He brandished the staff with a twirl and studied the spent grapple hook in his other hand before tossing it away. Harley followed The Joker's free hand as it came to rest on a yellow utility belt around his waist, one that looked far too similar to the one Batman was sporting. "Though I do admit, I didn't expect you to cheap out on me and give me a hand-me-down! Oh well, guess it's better than nothing, right?"

Batman let out a roar that startled Harley as he turned on The Joker in a flurry of blows. Harley reached up to her earpiece and said quickly, "Pammy, Kitty's freefallin' off the edge of the building! J's here now and B-man and I are on him! Save Kitty! I'll be okay here!" 

No response.

"Pammy? Red? Ivy?!"

Harley's heart sunk at the static in her ear and she stood numb watching the two men duke it out in front of her.

If The Joker had just got here, where had he been before? He obviously knew they were all here, even had his muscle waiting on them, so where was he during the first brawl? Did he know about their plan to hide Ivy underground and only have her reveal herself when things got too dicey? Shaking had begun in Harley's hands and spread into her shoulders and then to her whole body until she was vibrating, her knuckles turning white from the grip she had on her bat. She dashed forward, springing up and over Batman's head to hit Joker hard across the face. " _What did you do to Ivy?!_ " She screeched. He didn't even have a chance to respond before she struck him again, breathing heavily as she brutalized his face with the metal. Thick arms grabbed her by the middle and pulled her away, sending her into a frenzy of screams and swears as Batman dragged her away.

Joker got to his feet and wiped at the blood on his face in a fruitlessly. He grunted with a deep frown, "Jesus, Harley! Warn a man before you try and dome him, would you?" In her flailing attempts to free herself from Batman, Harley caught a glimpse of handgun coming out of Joker's waistband and redoubled her efforts to get away. "But don't worry, puddin'! I still got you a Christmas present! Sing it with me now folks, _twelve drummers drumming!_ "

The gunshot echoed like his voice had before, a bullet _pinging_ dangerously close to Harley's face. The noise seemed to distract Batman and she took the opportunity to wriggle free of his grapple and dove to the ground at the call of _'eleven pipers piping!'_ and another shot.

Harley ducked and rolled closer to the purple-clad clown, knocking his armed hand up in time to have him fire into the air and through one of the panels of the mirror ball, casting the tiniest bit of moonlight into the dark area. Joker glared down at her and brought the bo staff over to block her next bat swing. He leaned in close and said angrily, "You didn't let me say the next lyric! If you're going to be such a bah-humbug then you can go sit outside with the cat!" The gun barrel came to rest over where their weapons cross and Harley flinched despite herself. The shot went off, but the bullet went beside Harley's face and behind her. Glancing back, Harley caught sight of Batman hovering over the still unconscious Batgirl, protecting her from the gunfire. The Joker leaned in with the gun and whispered, "Why don't we put the kids to bed and then have some real, fun? Like old times? Whaddaya say, Harley-girl?"

"Fuck you!" She snarled, "What did you do to Ivy?!"

He stepped backwards, ducking away from her bat and attempting to block it again with the bo staff only to have it knocked from his grip and sent flying off somewhere unseen. "I must say, I am _wounded_ by how much you care about that plant! You used to be just like that for me; what happened to us?" He fired twice, just missing her both times, "Maybe you need another dip in the acid to help jog your memory because you seem to have forgotten that _I made you!_ " The next bullet hit Harley in her dominate shoulder and she reflexively dropped her weapon. The Joker loomed over her and bashed her in the cheek and temple with the gun before he pressed the hot tip of the gun against her head. "Now where was I? I lost count. Oh! I remember, _five golden rings!_ "

He was cut off near the end and yelped as he was swept off his feet and flung into a metal support beam a few feet away. Harley watched it happen in surprise but quickly felt her heart leap at the vines growing up towards her. Ivy rose from a hole in the floor and ran to her side to observe the wound and snap open one of her creepers to rub it's cool insides against the bleed. As it sealed itself up, Harley threw her arms around the green-skinned woman and practically sobbed, "I thought he got you!"

"I'm alright, just ran into some trouble on my way up." Ivy said with a small smile.

"Didya get Kitty?"

"I tried, but I couldn't find her anywhere. I think she saved herself from the fall."

Their conversation was cut short by another gunshot, but this time Ivy raised her hands and a wall of plant-life rose to protect them from it. Ivy exhaled deeply at the action and Harley anxiously noted her rapidly deteriorating state. "Easy, pretty girl, yer lookin' a little brown around the edges."

"I'll be fine, lets finish this--"

Batman flew over their hiding spot and decked The Joker across the face. Batgirl followed after him, throwing a glance at the two Sirens and stopping to face them and raising her fists. Harley and Ivy looked at each other and then back at the teen. "Ya really think ya can take us both on at once?" Harley snickered but stood. She looked around for her bat but shrugged it off and put up her dukes. "Shoulda stayed down, girlie."

"Please," Batgirl scoffed while circling the two, "this isn't the first time I've faced off against you two."

"True, but as I recall you needed Supergirl's help." Ivy mentioned with a slight sneer, "Poor little misguided girl, thinking you can fight off poison with brute force." She nudged Harley forward and muttered, "Go. I've got this." Bouncing up onto her toes, Harley kissed Ivy on the cheek before flipping over Batgirl and sticking her tongue out at the hero as she dashed away.

The Joker had been taking all of the blows from Batman with a grin and laugh, content to let the masked man have his moment before pointing the gun up and firing it directly into his chest. It didn't faze Batman at all and he advanced on the clown, expression in a permanent snarl. The Joker discharged the gun into his chest at point blank and frowned at the lack of pain from it. "Well that's just not fair, Bats! At least the kid had the decency to forget the bulletproof Kevlar when he came to visit me!" Harley watched the two dance around each other as she scaled up one of the support beams, crouching on it and waiting for an opportunity to attack. It came when The Joker aimed at Batman's head and shot off the tip of his cowl and Harley launched herself down to wrap her legs around Joker's head and slam him into the ground. The gun was pressed into her thigh and fired, the burn of the bullet ripping a yelp from her lips but not dislodging her choke hold. He glared up at her and aimed at her chest, but a batarang to the hand caused him to drop the firearm. Weaponless, The Joker struggled against Harley's hold, his fingers finding the bullet hole in her thigh and stabbing into it painfully. Harley released him with a shocked gasp and he barely rolled away from a gauntleted fist that was heavy enough to snap through the platform under them.

"Can't you two draw straws or something?" The clown asked in an exasperated tone, "This is fun and all, but having to fend off two exes that are both frothing at the mouth takes a lot of energy out of a guy! Why don't we play a little party game instead?" Joker reached into his utility belt and produce a batarang of his own while saying, "I think you'll like it, Batsy, it's the same one as last time! You loved it so much, I thought I'd try to recreate it just for you! It's called _'who's faster?'_. You? Or me?" He threw the batarang in the direction of Batgirl and Ivy, all eyes following it and not watching the clown pull a detonator out after it.

The entire mirror ball shook with the explosion, metal creaking loudly followed by a series of snaps and metallic groans. Harley looked all around trying to find the source of the small explosion and glanced over at Ivy, their eyes catching for just a moment before the platform under Harley gave way and sent her into a freefall. She could hear the meta-human scream after her as she plummeted rapidly, her hands grabbing for anything to save herself from the fall. Batman seemed to fly past her and straight to the The Joker as he fell, using his momentum to give him a powerful uppercut to the jaw and silence the horrible laugh. Watching the exchange led to Harley not seeing a metal beam approaching her and it hit her squarely in the chest, knocking the wind out of her and causing her to now fall end over end into the darkness.

As a true panic set in at the image of her body scattering into a bloody red mess across the Gotham streets, Harley felt something push up underneath her and lift her back into the sky. The debris that toppled around her were caught by the rising plants and were strapped down by vines and creepers to keep more from sailing to the ground below. She was quickly brought back up on level with the rest of the mirror ball and she watched Ivy drop to one knee with both hands pressed into the platform, breathing heavily and skin that sickly browning color. Harley got to her feet and hobbled as best she could over to the woman to fall heavily beside her, looking back to where she had just been and surprised to see that Ivy's vines had unknowingly saved Batman and The Joker as well. The caped crusader had The Joker in a headlock, choking the deranged man into unconsciousness and keeping a tight grip on him. Studying the crumbling terrain, the clown, the bat, and her girlfriend, Harley swallowed down her frustrations and pulled Ivy's arm across her shoulders to stand. "I'll get you outta here, Red." She promised.

"Not so fast." Batman called to her. Batgirl stepped behind them to block their escape while the muscled man approached still holding The Joker. "You've got a lot to answer for, Quinn."

Harley rolled her eyes and snapped, "I ain't done nothing to piss you off, B-man, scouts honor! We were only here for the giggle-mug and you ruined that too, so why don'tcha just let us run on home to catch all this on the mornin' news?"

"Not happening. Why were you in Ethiopia and why were you blackmailing relief workers into giving you medical supplies?"

The question made her eyes widened and she couldn't help but cackle. "The hell are you talkin' 'bout, Bats? I ain't been anywhere but here! 'specially not fuckin' Ethiopia!"

"Your DNA was found all over The Joker's equipment down there, and there are numerous reported sightings." The masked man's face tightened and his voice got dangerously low as he asked, "Why were you posing as Shelia Todd and what did you do with the real one? Or was there even a real one to begin with?"

"Okay, ya lost me. I mean, ya didn't have me in the first place but I legitimately have no idea what yer talkin' about now. I haven't left city limits, hell, I've barely left home for months! Just ask one of the girls! Last I heard of Joker was him bein' in Arkham but then he popped outta the ground like an ugly daisy and ruined my normal date night!" Harley thought she saw the clown move as she spoke but couldn't be sure. "If he was outside'ov Arkham, why wasn't it all over the news? Unless you knew he was loose and just didn't say anything! Holy shit, Bats, did you let The Joker go?! And you think I was helpin' him? Do you really think I'd drag Ivy and Kitty into his schemes?"

"Yes." Batman replied, "But I'm not here to talk about him, I'm here to let you try and defend yourself before I throw you back into a cell for good. You can claim whatever you want, but I've got hard evidence that says otherwise. I'll give you one last chance, what were you doing with him in Ethiopia?" The Joker moved, this time noticeably, and mumbled something under his breath. He cracked his eyes open to glare at Harley and his lips moved again. "Speak up, Joker." Batman commanded. 

Harley caught more movement and looked down to see a smaller, concealed pistol in his hand. It waggled back and forth and she realized it was aiming between herself and Batgirl. They eyes met again and this time Joker's mouth curled into a grin. The gun fired before she could move, and Harley found herself being pushed to the ground by Ivy as a thick creeper raced to shield her. No pain came, and there was no noise from beside her either meaning it missed Batgirl too, and Harley looked up at the vine that saved her and sighed in relief. "Ivy I--" She turned to look at the woman but stopped at the almost blank look on her face. Ivy met her gaze and her expression became one of remorse. Harley's eyes flicked down to the slowly spreading bloom of red from Ivy's chest and felt her entire body go numb.

"I said, _and a partridge in a pear tree!_ " The Joker bellowed with a throat tearing howl of laughter. Batman twisted his arm in a sickening way and it audibly snapped under the pressure, Joker still grinning as he was forced to the ground with a heavy knee pressed into his back.

Ivy fell forward stiffly, down to her knees first before landing face down. Harley limped to her side and dropped beside her, hands shaking as she turned her over and pulled the woman into her lap. Her throat was closing and she couldn't force any words out, her fingers twitching and hovering from the wound to Ivy's face. Before she could decide where to put them, a yellow and black cape was wadded up and pressed to the wound and Batgirl knelt on the other side of the meta-human. "I have some sealant in my belt," She spoke quickly, "did the bullet go all the way through?" Harley just stared in silence and the teen leaned closer and yelled, "Harley snap out of it! Is there an exit wound?"

"I-I don't..." She finally forced out, tears filling her eyes and her focusing going back to Ivy. "Pammy, _no._ I'm sorry, I'm sorry, _please._ " Her voice broke with a painful sob and she brushed the woman's red hair out of her face as gently as her shaking hands would allow her. 

Pamela released a shuddering breath, the sound rattling in her chest and bringing with it a grossly wet sound from between her lips. "It's okay..." She whispered, her voice rough, "I'll be okay...n-nature..."

"...finds a way." Harley finished for her with a lame smile, "But I don't want you to go. I want you to stay, pretty girl. Stay with me just a little bit longer." Her face scrunched in misery but she tried to keep her voice strong, "I bet the sunrise is nice from up here. Stay and watch it with me, Red. _Please._ Don't leave me."

There wasn't an immediate reply, not even another strained gasp, and Harley forced her eyes open to look. Pamela stared past her with an unseeing gaze, her mouth opening slightly as a harsh cough bubbled blood up from between her teeth. "I..." She uttered weakly, "until th-the...end..." Her chest caught on it's next inhale, trying and failing to gather more air in a couple of tense hiccups. There was no exhale, no movement, and no sound as Ivy went still.

Harley went still with her, staring with her mouth agape and eyes wide. Her voice was small and sounded far away, like it was someone else speaking from a distance. "P-Pamela...?" Fingers traced along her jaw and to her lips, feeling the cooling skin and willing it to go warm again. "Hey, it's not funny...you can't--" A new sob burst from her mouth and Harley hunched over her face, letting out a wounded scream that left an ache in her head. " _You promised!_ " She cried, " _You promised! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! It's my fault and I'm sorry! Please! I don't wanna be alone! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!_ "

A gentle hand touched her shoulder and Batgirl tried to nudge her away. "Harley..." She said in a condoling manner.

" _No!_ " Harley shoved her off, practically laying over Ivy at this point in an attempt to protect her from the world around them, "Leave us alone!"

A firmer hand grabbed her by the arm and pulled her up. Harley jerked away but couldn't break free, her struggles slowly waning with the exhaustion of her mind and body. Selina tucked her into her arms for a quick hug, saying into her ear, "We need to go, Harls."

A new fire lit in her belly and the blonde tried her best to get away. "Not without her!" She screamed, "We can't leave her, Kitty! We gotta get her home!" Catwoman ignored her pleading and slung Harley over her shoulder, turning away from the scene and jogging towards an exit. "No!" Harley wailed, "No, no, no! Put me down! I hate you! I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you! Pammy! Please!" Batgirl watched them go, flinching with every scream but staying quiet. The young hero reached down and unfurled her cape to spread the bloodied fabric over the body. "Don't you touch her! Don't even look at her! This is your fault! I'll kill you! _I'll kill you, I'll kill you, I'll kill you!_ This is all your fault!"

They escaped into the night, Catwoman leaping out of the mirror ball and landing on part of the green that stretched up to keep it stable, sliding down it a ways before jumping off and producing her whip to catch a nearby fire escape and swing them towards it. Harley didn't stop screaming, not even when her voice went hoarse, her weak attempts at kicking and hitting Selina lessening as they left the scene behind them. Somewhere between the tower and the apartment Harley took up repeating a new mantra.

"It's all my fault." She wept, "It's all my fault, it's all my fault...my fault..."

The apartment felt cold. The sight of the potted plants on the counter tops, the shoes and scarves left by the door, the dog-eared books and magazines on the coffee table, it all weighed heavily in Harley's mind and heart. She sat on the couch paralyzed as Selina patched up her wounds. She vaguely thought about the bloodstains she was leaving on the couch, hearing from somewhere behind her that familiar annoyed sigh.

_"Harls, please don't ruin the furniture."_

Her head whipped around to search the kitchen for the source of the voice only to find nothing. She faced forward again as Bud and Lou nosed their heads into her lap, the hyenas flanking either side of her and warming her. Harley pet them behind the ears and had half a mind to remind them that it wasn't couch time, that they were smelly and Ivy didn't--

Air caught in her lungs and Harley let her face screw up and fresh tears come to her eyes. The comfort of her boys and the soothing words from Selina weren't enough to keep her from sinking back into that dark place in her mind. 

It was her fault. She had had a warning the first time they tried to fight Joker -- the first time _she_ tried. It was selfish of her to have even considered dragging her friends into this mess; it was her problem that she should have dealt with on her own. All things considered, the situation was one she put herself into. It was Harleen who got herself entwined with The Joker, and it was Harley who kept running back to him again and again even though each time it killed her a little more. She hadn't learned a damn thing, or was clearly a glutton for punishment, because she had ran right back to him again and let him kill another part of her. But this time it wasn't just her who got hurt, and she couldn't even push all of the blame onto Joker.

Selfish. That's what he had called her the night he beat her and she ran to Ivy. It felt like a far off memory, how Pamela had taken care of Harley that morning and held her and protected her from the thoughts and the shame. But that's what made Harley selfish. If she had a problem, she ran right to Ivy and made her deal with it. Even now, the failed plan tonight, was just another way of Harley dumping all her problems onto her best friend and letting her settle them. And now she was dead.

A hand lifted to her chest to feel her heart beat, her fingers gripping the fabric of her shirt tightly and a humorless laugh was force out of her. It was suppose to bring her comfort and reassurance, it was suppose to mean safety, it was suppose to be Pamela. But Harley hurt her again, ran away from her again, and she was alone again. Ivy would let her leave and come back all the time without seeming to mind, but how was Harley suppose to come back when Ivy had gone to a place she couldn't find. She was alone entirely now. When she'd succumb to the dark of her mind and think of this day coming, Harley always thought it would be the crushing weight of the world on her shoulders that would do her in. She hadn't even considered the void forming in her chest that left her feeling hollow and worthless.

Worthless. That's another thing Mistah J had called her. Another thing he was right about. When they first met, Harley thought Poison Ivy was fearless. When Harley finally met Pamela Isley, she realized that it was a wall built up from years of abuse and suffering, something Harley could understand. She wanted to break down those walls, to set her free. She was suppose to stop burdening Ivy with her problems and be there for hers. It was a useless attempt and an empty promise. The fact that Harley wanted to be Ivy's reason to stay around was laughable. Who would want to stay with someone so selfish, so worthless, so horrible. Who could love someone like that. Why would they. 

Did that mean that Ivy was only with her out of pity? Was she using Harley to feel better about herself? Was she manipulating her like The Joker had? Or was it the other way round: was Harley manipulating Ivy. It sure seemed like it. Poison Ivy was the smartest person Harley had ever met, so how did she ever let herself walk right into a trap like that and just...die. And for Harley? For a human being? For an idiot, a failure, an insane and murderous fool, a selfish and worthless, pointless shell of a person? Why? Why would she even keep Harley around, why would she be with her, why would she trust her with all her darkest secrets and worst nightmares, why would she follow her into hell, why would she take a bullet for her?

A small voice, frail and young and still hopeful whispered in the back of her mind.

_"Because she loved you, Harley."_

Sick to her stomach and wishing the voice of Harleen would leave her alone, Harley covered her face with her hands and cried. The last person she wanted advice or comfort from was the stupid girl that started it all. But maybe now they were equally as stupid. Equally pathetic, useless, worthless.

Selina held Harley and tried to comfort her with soft hands and quiet reassurances, but it just wasn't the same. Did Selina blame Harley too? Poison Ivy and Catwoman went way back, friends and allies long before Harley Quinn was even a twinkle in Harleen's eye. How could Selina sit here and cuddle the person who killed her best friend? How did she not leave Harley to bleed out or throw her off the platform to see how far she'd bounce after hiding the concrete? Maybe she was just biding her time. Catwoman was famous for how well thought out her plans were, something that Harley should have taken advantage of before running in guns blazing.

"Why don't you come stay with me for a little while." Selina murmured, "I don't want to be alone right now, and I bet you don't either."

Harley said nothing, only thought to herself how it'd be better if Selina just slit her throat and left her here to die on the couch. Maybe things would be easier then. Maybe then there would be justice for Ivy.

The thought of justice only put images of Batman in her mind, of all the times he foiled her plans in the name of it and told her she'd be facing it. Of all the times The Joker would laugh in his face and the face of due process and get away with a few broken bones and a trip to Arkham. Why does he let The Joker get away with all the things he does? Out of all of the rogues, The Joker's body counter was astronomically higher than anyone else's. He would take and take, and all for what? A joke no one got? Just because he could? Because he knew Batman would let him? Why did The Joker get to be this ruthless monster, get away with slaughtering hundreds of innocents and not-so-innocents and still be allowed to wake up in the morning?

Harley's chest heaved with rage at the thoughts, her mind racing now. How could Batman, the dark knight, the man who literally called himself vengeance, let a homicidal maniac keep killing people? Where was the justice for the graveyards full of people he had murdered for a quick laugh? Where was the justice for the families that had to find a way to move on with their lives while watching the man who ruined their lives be broadcasted on the television every night? 

Where was the justice for Harley and all the times The Joker brutalized her? Batman knew, he had always known but never thought to step in, to save her. 

Where was the justice for Ivy? Batman had stood aside, careless and stupid, and let The Joker murder her in cold blood. And Harley was willing to bet that he was on his way to Arkham right now, to the nice cell with a bed and a hot meal in the morning. How dare he start this whole shitshow and just waltz in and out? How dare he kill again with zero repercussions? How dare he get to watch the sunrise?

And how _fucking_ dare _Batman_ let him keep living.

That was the common thread, the single thing connecting all of these atrocities and all of this pain. Batman, standing tall and proud on a pile of dead bodies and claiming to have honor and integrity and repeating over and over again that stupid fucking phrase.

_"I am vengeance."_

Oh, Harley would show him _vengeance._ She'd show him _justice._

Her goal was still the same as before. She was going to make The Joker hurt like she did. But now she wanted him to feel this earth shattering misery, this cruel and endless agony of having all you hold dear ripped away from you.

Harley Quinn was going to kill The Batman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ┴┤( ͡° ͜ʖ├┬ so, you made it  
> OKAY LOOK I'M SORRY OKAY. I'LL BE THE FIRST ONE TO SAY IT, THIS CHAPTER IS JUST UNFAIR AND MEAN. but when I say it's pain time™ I mean business. I also fully intended for this chapter to take longer to get out, but I've been going through things and have a lot of free time on my hands and just got. so invigorated by the season 3 announcement for the HQ cartoon that I powered through and wrote most of it today! I haven't eaten and I made myself cry like five times!! (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) annnnyway, I'm gonna go eat some oatmeal. you should too! (it's very good!) chapter five will be out...sometime. sorry for the pain and heartache, know that it will not last!!! (omg, spoilers) go read something nice and fluffy, google baby weasels and say 'awww' out loud for four minutes straight, and thank you so much for reading! I love you all! ♡(｡- ω -)


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